Billy & Teddy | Backdated to Jan 29
Jan. 29th, 2018 11:20 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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ax_mainBilly comes back to school. Teddy's been waiting.
Warning: Sugar, Nothing but sugar. NSFD - Not safe for diabetics.
Billy had already been hugged about four times by his parents, his mom backing off only to come back again to give him a squeeze and a kiss on the forehead. After the fifth kiss he finally pushed her gently away with a groan. “Okay, Okay. I need to get back. I already missed Spanish and communications.”
He tried to ignore the way his dad’s eyes looked a little wet and he reached out for high five from him, which he got a hair ruffle instead.
“You call us if you feel like your medication isn’t working. Understand?” Billy mentally rolled his eyes at how quickly his mom went from sappy to business and nodded as he tried to fix his hair. “Billy, I want audible confirmation.”
“Yes, mom. I will call you if anything happens. I promise.” He gave them a small smile and tilted his head towards the door. “Don’t you guys have stuff to do? Ya know, like being doctors or something?”
He laughed as his mom smacked him on the arm, but he could see her trying not to smile as she handed him his duffel bag. “I love you guys.”
“We love you too, honey.”
He closed his eyes with a smile and started to chant, wishing to be back where he belonged. Back where he could see his friends everyday and sleep curled up against Teddy. He felt the magic wrap around him in a burst and when it faded he could tell her was somewhere else. He opened his eyes and let out a happy sigh at the sight of his room, Teddy’s side still neat and orderly while his was a slightly neater mess (Teddy must of shoved his clothes into piles). He tossed his duffle bag on the floor and frowned at the two separate beds, walking over to the side of his and bent down to start pushing.
Oof. He was able to get the bed going at an angle and sighed as he sat back. “Gunna need Teddy after all.”
Even though Teddy was in a better mood than he'd been in a long time, he still wasn't able to concentrate at all that morning. He kept looking at the clock, checking his phone surreptitiously, even when that got him the stink-eye from his teachers. Second period over he couldn't take it any longer and he practically bolted for his room. Billy hadn't given him an exact time, but it was supposed to be this morning, and the wait was making him a little bit crazy.
He probably should be a lot more concerned about that, really. They'd only been apart a week, and even then they'd been talking constantly, but everything had been so upside down since Limbo... it didn't mean that he was too hung up on Billy, did it? Even if it did, did that really matter?
No, he decided, jogging down the dorm hall. He was allowed to be excited to see his boyfriend, even if enthusiasm was somehow less than cool. Was that noise from inside? Teddy opened the door, and a smile split his face wide. He headed in, dropping his bag and making a beeline (heh) for Billy. "You're back!"
When he heard the door open Billy turned to look and couldn’t help the large grin from forming on his face as he saw Teddy. He quickly pushed himself to his feet, opening his mouth to say that he was back only to be grabbed, hoisted up in the air with Teddy’s ridiculous strength and kissed. Billy wasted no time, not even caring that their door was still kind of open, as he wrapped his arms around Teddy’s neck and kissed him back. He pulled back with a gasp and laughed breathlessly. “Miss me much?”
He leaned down to press soft kisses to Teddy’s cheeks, nose and eyelids, a little drunk on the feeling of being back in Teddy’s arms.
This was better, this was so much better than all of those long silences and dark moods, the faint greetings that had left him wondering -- so unfairly -- if Billy even cared for him anymore. Teddy buried his face in Billy's neck, his arms locked securely under his butt, Billy's kisses making everything all right with the world.
The door was still open and Teddy nudged it closed with his foot, still grinning like an idiot when he lifted his head again. "Hmm," he pretended to consider the question. "Nope. Not at all. Certainly not the entire time you were gone, or anything hopeless like that."
“Oh yeah, sure.” Billy laughed, lacing his fingers together behind Teddy’s head and moving so he could lean his forehead against his boyfriend’s with a soft sigh. It felt like he was actually here now, in body and mind, and he could enjoy this again without his thoughts going dark. “God, I missed you. Texting and the phone weren't enough.”
He closed his eyes as he took a deep breath, knowing what he was about to say was long over due and that made him the worst. “Teddy...I’m so sorry for all of that. I know that I couldn't help the depression, but I could have gotten help a lot sooner and because I was stubborn, you suffered.”
That was definitely a sign that things were going to be different. Two weeks ago Billy would have taken his head off for even suggesting that there was something wrong, and now to apologize for it-- still, that didn't sit right either. "You just said it yourself -- you couldn't help it." Teddy brought one hand up to brush Billy's hair back from his eyes, the dark tangle like silk in his fingers. "I wouldn't be mad at you for getting... I dunno. The flu. I'd be annoyed if you puked on my shoes because of it," he did amend, "but that's not the same thing as needing to apologize for getting sick in the first place. And I think I've driven this analogy entirely into the ground."
Billy opened his eyes to give Teddy a dubious look, but it kind of failed due to their faces being so close so he just shook his head slightly. “The metaphor is kinda weak. I purposefully refused to get help because I thought I would be fine. I watched you break your back to try to help me and Nick at the same time,” Billy took a deep breath, not liking the sickly guilt that pooled in his stomach. “And I didn’t do anything about it. I felt bad, but I didn’t try to fix it. That was shitty of me.”
"Hey, none of that." Teddy set Billy back down on the ground, not to get rid of him, but to get his other hand free. He slipped that one into Billy's hair as well, cupping his face between Teddy's hands. "No spiralling down into wherever it is you go when you're feeling bad about stuff. You just got back, and you're doing better, and all of that is behind us now." It was partly a statement, but also partly a question. It is all going to be okay now, right?
Billy reached up to cover Teddy’s hand with his, loving how big and warm Teddy’s hands were. He turned his head to kiss the outside of Teddy’s palm and wished he could tell Teddy that none of that would ever happen again, that his depression was cured forever. He swallowed and glanced up at Teddy in worry, nervous about how he would take what Billy had to say. “I can’t promise that I won’t ever feel like that again, something might happen or my body might change so that the medication might not work as well.”
He took a steadying breath and looked at Teddy with determination. “But, I can promise that if that does happen, I will immediately tell my doctor so that we can find something that will work again.”
"That's fair." Teddy nodded, even as he tried to banish the fear that Billy would start slipping away again right in front of him. He'd begged Billy to trust him - it had to go both ways. "And if I notice something changing, I can check in with you and see how you're doing without hurting your feelings?"
And that was the thing. He needed to be able to listen when people around him noticed something was off and not get upset if it was brought to attention. Billy gave a slow nod, then a more forceful one to show that he wouldn’t let that happen again. “Yes. If you notice something, I want you to tell me. Talk with me about it. It maybe be something or it may be nothing, but I think bringing it to my attention is good.”
Billy turned his head to kiss Teddy’s palm again. “I’m going to do my very best not to put us through that again.”
Billy's lips brushed warm against his skin and shivers coursed along Teddy's skin at the contact. The conversation was important, obviously -- super-important. But it had become a whole lot less interesting. "I know you will," he murmured, very aware of Billy's nearness in a way he hadn't been for a while. He still had Billy's face cupped between his palms, so it was easy to hold Billy steady and duck his head down, press his lips to Billy's. Starving, he was starving and desperately thirsty, and Billy his oasis in the desert.
Billy was so okay with this turn of events, wanting Teddy to know he was really going to try, but also he hadn’t been near his boyfriend in a week. With his sex drive back in full force, Billy surged up on his tip toes so he could deepen the kiss, arms quickly snaking around Teddy’s neck to hold him there. He didn’t care if he seemed needy as he ran his tongue boldly over the seam of Teddy’s lips to ask for more.
How could he have not wanted this? How could he have not wanted to kiss every inch of skin on Teddy’s body all the time? Fuck his depressed ass self, they were crazy.
Everything else fled Teddy's mind, his body responding to Billy in ways that left no room for doubts or even coherent thought. He opened to Billy, tasted him in return, rediscovering the shape of his mouth, the small sounds he made in his throat. They had some time now, and privacy -- no-one but him knew Billy was back yet, so no-one was likely to come looking for them. The best of all the wicked thoughts Teddy'd been having over the past few weeks resurfaced, and now he didn't have to try and push them away.
"I have been," Teddy murmured against Billy's lips, breaking the kiss. "Thinking about this-" He dropped his hands from Billy's face to his shoulders and started gently steering him so that in a matter of a couple of steps, Billy's back would be up against the wall. "For weeks."
“Oh thank god.” Billy groaned, greedily pulling Teddy back down for another kiss when his back hit the wall. He had been nervous, so nervous that because he didn’t want to do anything that Teddy would feel unwanted and start looking for a way out. Find someone better, not broken, someone who could give him the attention he deserved instead Billy who snapped at him and broke every promise he made. Billy’s breath hitched and his throat tightened at the thought, but he covered it by biting down on Teddy’s lower lip gently. Teddy still wanted him, still wanted to be with him and it made Billy want to cry in relief.
He also couldn’t remember the last time he had been so turned on. He pulled away with a soft laugh and grinned up at Teddy. “Once I started feeling things again, you were busy putting on quite the show in my head. How do you feel about lingerie and garters?”
Teddy had been focusing tight on the bright sparking ache of Billy's teeth on his lip, the hot skin of Billy's stomach as he ran his hands up under the hem of Billy's shirt, on how long he could possibly hold out before he gave in and dropped to his knees in front of Billy right there- He stopped mid-explore with a surprised laugh. "On you, or me?" he teased, biting his way down the tight tendon along the side of Billy's throat. "This is what comes from watching Rocky Horror too many times in your formative years."
Billy’s sarcastic laugh quickly turned into a moan at being bitten. Jesus Christ that was amazing! He pushed his shoulders back against the wall so he could rock his hips forward against Teddy’s in retaliation, pleasure spiking in his stomach at the contact. Aw man, he wasn’t going to make it long. “And what exactly were your fantasies, huh?”
To heck with trying to hold off. Billy certainly didn't seem like he was about to complain. "About to live 'em right now." He paused, lips against Billy's sternum, and looked up at Billy, holding eye contact even as he headed down. "Assuming you don't mind, of course," he added politely, though his grin was wicked.
Billy was surprised he had any brain cells left in his head as he watched where Teddy was headed with that look. He grinned when Teddy was on his knees, cupping Teddy’s jaw and moving to press his thumb against the plush part of Teddy’s lower lip. “Oh, yeah. I super mind doing anything sexual with my fantastic boyfriend. Watch me mind.”
He let his hands trail into Teddy’s hair and grip tight.
————-
Billy let out a content sigh, naked limbs spread across their double bed while Teddy laid out right beside him. This was right, this was how things were supposed to be. He could feel a stupid goofy smile come onto his face as he rolled on top of the other and beam down at him.
“Hey.” He whispered, giving Teddy a soft kiss on the lips, then nose. His lips tingled and his jaw ached, but watching Teddy come undone had been more than worth it. He loved this boy. He loved him loved him loved him loved him! Billy leaned to press his mouth against Teddy’s again and mouthed the words softly against his lips.
Still floating on a cloud of euphoria, Teddy wrapped his arms around Billy and held on tight. The year had started off shitty, but today -- he wanted to hold on to this specific feeling forever. He kissed Billy back, moving to make space for Billy's legs to slot between his, and feeling rather than hearing the phrase on his lips.
His heart was too full of feelings, and they were spilling out all over the place without Teddy even being brave enough to give them a name. It was that, wasn't it? They were all symptoms - the soul-deep ache when Billy was hurting, the way he felt a dozen times better when Billy entered a room, the craving he felt for Billy's company, his laugh, and yeah, his touch. Whatever it was, it was more everything than anything he'd felt before. Could that be nothing more than infatuation? Really?
Still, the idea of saying the words scared him. He kissed Billy again, brushed his thumb along the sharply angled sweep of Billy's cheekbone, met his dark, warm gaze and held it. "You know, right?" Teddy did say, softly so as not to break the fragile bubble of the perfect moment. "I don't have to say it?"
He hadn’t really said it, not really, but the way Billy’s heart thudded against his chest like it was a stampede of wild buffalo made it seem like it didn’t care about actual words. His smile became wobbly and he refused to cry in front of Teddy because he was happy, propping himself up on his elbows so he could look down at the other.
“Yeah.” He whispered, his throat choking the words a little. How could he doubt after this past month? How could he think Teddy didn’t feel the same for him even if he couldn’t say it? He couldn’t. Teddy’s actions screamed love, and he leaned down to kiss the other so Teddy wouldn’t notice how damp his eyes were. “Yeah, you’re good. I got it.”
Teddy wanted to say the words but they stuck in his throat, too big and too terrifying to let out. Billy knew, though; he knew and he saved Teddy from himself again, absolution and forgiveness in his kisses. Words were too hard when things were this important, the right ones elusive and the wrong ones blunt weapons. Kissing he could do, though. They were getting pretty good at this part.
"Welcome back," he did say after a little while, luxuriating in the weight of Billy's body on top of his. "Just -- don't think that you have to go away again to get this kind of homecoming party, k?" He smiled, to show he was (mostly) teasing, and kissed the end of Billy's nose.
“Oh?” Billy grinned, propping himself up on his elbows, trapping Teddy’s head between them so he could look down at other. “Then is it really a homecoming party? Wouldn’t it be more like a ‘Yay! You came back from the bathroom’ party? Which I mean hey, if you wanna do that everytime I leave the room, I’m super on board. Just let me know.”
He let his hands move into Teddy’s hair while his elbows took his weight and let his blunt bitten nails scratch at Teddy’s scalp.
If Teddy could purr, he would. He let his eyes close instead and tipped his head back in bliss. "That would be awesome. Super-awkward when we have friends in the room, mind you."
Teddy looked so good with his head tipped back like that and he leaned down to kiss Teddy’s exposed throat softly. “Well, they’ll just have to get used to it. They need to know what to expect when we see each other after being part for ten minutes.”
"I'm pretty sure we're already 'that couple,' just for the record. The one people roll their eyes at because we're kind of sickening."
Billy couldn’t help but laugh at that, smothering his laugh in Teddy's neck before giving it a soft bite. Man, he had missed this. “Oh, I’m sure we are that couple.” He said against the skin he’d marked, watching it fade back to fair pink in no time. “Honestly, I don’t mind being that couple. When I saw them at my old school I thought, really? But now I get it. Wanting to be around the person who makes you happy is just kind of human nature isn’t it?”
The thought itself was intoxicating, and another wave of gratitude washed over Teddy. Not only was Billy back, and sounding like his old self, he'd forgiven Teddy for interfering and he still loved him - Teddy was still the one who made him happy. He'd have been thankful for any one of those, but all together was a gift. "It helps when the person is as amazing as you," he said, leaving his head tipped back so Billy could keep on doing that.
Billy didn’t stop scratching Teddy’s scalp, but he did raise a questioning eyebrow at those words. Amazing people didn’t drag their loved ones through hell with them just because they were stubborn nor did they snap at them when they were only trying to help, but he kept his mouth shut. “I’m glad you think so. You aren’t too bad yourself, ya know?”
He pressed a kiss to Teddy’s upturned chin, wanting to make up for all the time he wanted nothing to do with physical contact. “Thank you for sticking with me, Tee. I’m serious. You had every right to just give up on me or walk away, but you didn’t and that means a lot to me.”
Teddy cracked one eye open and smiled up at Billy's too-serious expression. They'd been too serious for too many weeks; he needed to see a smile back on Billy's face. Needed it like air. "We live together," he pointed out, his smile turning to teasing. "It's not like I can just block your number and drop a box of your stuff off at your door."
Billy frowned, but it wasn’t serious and he leaned over so he he could nip at the tip of Teddy’s nose lightly. He could take a hint so he shut up. “Yeah yeah. As if blocking my number would stop me even if we didn't live together. I’m not that easy to get rid of. Except I don’t know if I could go completely stalker, that takes a lot of work and I’m really lazy. Would you settle for a few late night calls and maybe some pictures of you in my room if I could ever figure out the printer?”
"What, no shrine?" Teddy laughed, then let things get more sombre again, just for a moment. "I'm not walking away, k? Not then, and not ever. I know I made you nuts," he apologized sheepishly, "And I don't know what I'm doing most of the time, but even if it comes out clumsy, I'm never going to give up on you when you need me."
Billy bent down low so he could bury his face in Teddy’s neck and groan, slapping Teddy on the opposite shoulder weakly as he did. “You butt.” He grumbled. “You can’t go saying great things like that. I’m vulnerable right now, I’m more likely to get soppy on you if you talk like that.”
Teddy had trouble saying the L word, but had just said he’d never leave Billy. Oh geeze. How was Teddy real?
"You love my butt," Teddy replied, half-giddy and grinning like an idiot.
“Ugh. You’re so cocky.” Billy pulled his head up and tried to look disgusted, but it only lasted for a second before he was grinning. “How’s that butt I love feel about getting some pants on so we can get food? My mom tried to shove a five-course meal down my throat before I left, but I was too nervous to even take a sip of orange juice so of course now I’m starving. You’re little fun welcome home party didn’t help.”
He stuck out his tongue and pulled his hands away from Teddy’s head.
"So. Many. Possible jokes," Teddy groaned, his smile wide and laughter in his voice. "I can't choose. Do I stay easy with the low-hanging fruit and riff on 'cocky,'" he asked aloud, "or go for broke and dive into all that innuendo about being starving and having things shoved down your-?"
Billy didn’t think he could roll his eyes hard enough, but he tried and punched Teddy lightly in the shoulder as he tried to hide his amusement. “Inappropriate, Mr. Altman. How dare you twist my words into that.”
He leaned down to capture Teddy’s lips, humming happily as he quickly turned it filthy and rocked his hips down best he could against Teddy’s with a soft gasp. He pulled back after a bit, eyes hooded as he licked his lips and grinned. “Get your head out of the gutter, Tee.”
Then he rolled away and off the bed.
Teddy was one-hundred percent behind everything Billy was doing, until the moment he rolled away. Teddy flopped over onto his stomach in a half-hearted attempt to catch him, reaching out plaintively as Billy got to his feet and sauntered away. Teddy let his hand flop back down to the bed and he let out a faintly frustrated whimper, just so Billy would know. "You're cruel and terrible," Teddy accused him, laughing.
“Oh, you didn’t know?” Billy bent down to get a jacket out of one of his packed duffles. He pulled out the overly large green striped zip hoodie that hadn’t started out as his and grinned. Perfect He pulled it on and shot Teddy wink. “The meds help make me feel better, but also boosts my confidence so now I can finally become the evil villain I always dreamed of. First on my evil list is be a tease.”
"Mission accomplished." Teddy propped himself up on his elbows and watched Billy, taking in the sight of those ridiculous legs of his, and the total lack of pants- He frowned. "Is that my hoodie? I was looking for that!"
“Erm, excuse me? I stole it, so I’m pretty sure it’s mine.” He grinned moving over to find his pants that had been tossed, quickly shoving his legs into them and buttoning them with ease. He walked back over to the bed and crawled on, leaning over to give Teddy a sweet kiss. “Your stuff is more comfortable anyway, smells like you. Except not anymore, kinda been sleeping with this guy for a few days.”
"I'm not sure whether to be flattered, charmed or vaguely disgusted." Teddy leaned over and kissed him back. "Tell me your mom at least did your laundry."
“Oh, sweetie. Are you put off by dirty clothes? You think I let my mom touch this thing at all this week?” Billy raised an eyebrow, humming as he placed a few more kisses along Teddy’s the side of his neck and bare shoulder. God, his skin was so smooth. Guess healing meant no need for lotion either. He grinned against the warm skin and gave it a bite. “Just kidding. She made me wash it after the third day of being there.”
"Trust me, that's for the best." Teddy tipped his head back and nuzzled Billy's ear, in no hurry to get up. But- "Did you call me 'sweetie'?" he asked, faintly disturbed.
Billy snorted, grinning as he mushed his face against Teddy’s shoulder. “Oh? What you didn’t like it? Want something better? Like...honey bear? Sugar drop? Lovely bunches? My sun? My moon? My basherter!”
Billy looked up, barely able to contain his laughter. “Want to be my destiny?”
"Your 'bullshitter'? What?" Teddy laughed, knowing he hadn't nailed the unfamiliar word, but coming as close as he could. He reached up and ruffled Billy's hair -- what he could reach of it anyway, with Billy half-draped over his back. "And 'destiny's really sweet in concept, but as a nickname - eh. It sounds like I'm a pole dancer." They'd fallen into shortening each other's nicknames pretty easily, but nothing else quite felt right.
Billy couldn’t help cracking up at Teddy’s butchering of the word, sliding off his boyfriend’s back to lay down next to him on his side, head propped up on his hand. “If you were a pole dancer, I’d be broke in one night. I fell in love with Destiny and he took all my money.”
He giggled like a fool and shook his head. “Mmmm...nah. I think I like Tee best. Tee or maybe babe. Maybe.”
Teddy shook his head, but he couldn't help laughing. "Man, you're wired today. Is this the new-and-improved version, or are you really just that giddy to be back?" He smoothed his hand down Billy's spine, settled his palm in the curve at the small of Billy's back.
“Wired? Is that a joke about my electricity?” Billy chuckled as he reached out to tug gently on the small silver hoops of Teddy’s ears, surprised by the pang of how much he missed doing that. “Sorry, I can dial back the energy if you’d like. Just missed you, us,” he motioned to them laying in bed. “This.”
"I'll take that answer." Teddy leaned in and pressed a kiss against Billy's temple, breathing him in. Just, all of him -- his shampoo and the unfamiliar scent of a different laundry detergent and all. "And don't change. Don't change for anyone, least of all me. Just be you. However you're feeling today."
Billy hummed happily at the affection, scooting himself closer so he could press up against Teddy’s side. “If you say so, then I won’t.” He laid there quietly, closing his eyes so he could listen to the sounds of their quiet room and Teddy’s breathing. “I’m hungry and I promised I would go to my afternoon classes, but now I don’t want to leave.”
Teddy curled up against him, but a guilty conscience caught up with him a few seconds later. "Pants," he sighed, kissed Billy one last time and forced himself to sit up. "Yeah. We should get food, and don't you dare skip class on your first day back. I'm not going to run the risk of your parents dragging you home again. Not when you've only just gotten back. Because we'll be back here together tonight. And tomorrow. And after that."
The idea of going back to class and hearing how much he would have to work to not flunk out sounded gross. Billy groaned dramatically and buried his face in Teddy’s pillow, letting the fabric cut off his air flow for a few seconds before he lifted his head with a gasp. “Fine! Fine. You have a point.”
He rolled off their bed (their bed again) and moved to get his socks and shoes back on. “Um, hey, does the offer still stand on helping me with some of my class work? Cause, I absolutely know I’m going to need it, now that I have my head out of my ass.”
He shoved his feet into his shoes, not bothering to tie them, and moved over to take Teddy’s hand. “You can totally say no by the way. I get it.”
Standing and halfway through pulling his pants back on, Teddy ignored his buttons and tangled his fingers with Billy's instead. "Of course I'll help. And for entirely selfish reasons too, so don't feel guilty. Once you get caught up we'll have a lot more time to goof off again."
That brought a grin to Billy’s face and he unwound their hands so he could button and zip Teddy’s pants for him. “Well, then I’m all for selfish motives. As long as they get me more time to doing nothing with you, then selfish it up please.”
He let his arms slide around Teddy’s waist so his hands could slip into Teddy’s back pockets and give a squeeze. “We should go.”
"If we must," Teddy sighed, but he kissed Billy's nose with a grin before stepping aside to grab his shirt and haul it back over his head. "Brace yourself," he advised cheerfully, shaking his hair back into some semblance of order. "Everyone keeps asking me when you're going to be back. You're going to get mobbed, Mr. Popular."
“But I don’t wanna be mobbed.” Billy whined, leaning down to grab his book bag and hoisting it up on his shoulder. “I don’t want to have to answer ‘how are you doing’ over and over. I should just write ‘I’m OK’ on my forehead before I go out.”
"Post something on the forums?" Teddy suggested, waiting until Billy was ready and lacing their fingers together. "You know, 'hi, I'm back, it's all good, anyone feel like kicking my butt at MarioKart?'"
Teddy smiled innocently.
“Are you trying to start something, Altman?” Billy gaped, but quickly grinned and tugged on Teddy closer to the door with their linked hands. “Cause I’ll blue shell you into oblivion, just name the time.”
"Hufflepuffs never start fights," Teddy replied, with pious solemnity. At least until the corner of his mouth started twitching upwards.
“Oh no?” Billy raised an eyebrow. “That’s alright because we Slytherins are good at starting them.”
Doing this again, just the back and forth, made Billy feel like he was floating he was so happy. Glancing down to make sure he wasn’t actually floating before giving Teddy one last kiss. “Walk me to class after we eat?”
Teddy smiled. That was an easy one. "Any time."
Warning: Sugar, Nothing but sugar. NSFD - Not safe for diabetics.
Billy had already been hugged about four times by his parents, his mom backing off only to come back again to give him a squeeze and a kiss on the forehead. After the fifth kiss he finally pushed her gently away with a groan. “Okay, Okay. I need to get back. I already missed Spanish and communications.”
He tried to ignore the way his dad’s eyes looked a little wet and he reached out for high five from him, which he got a hair ruffle instead.
“You call us if you feel like your medication isn’t working. Understand?” Billy mentally rolled his eyes at how quickly his mom went from sappy to business and nodded as he tried to fix his hair. “Billy, I want audible confirmation.”
“Yes, mom. I will call you if anything happens. I promise.” He gave them a small smile and tilted his head towards the door. “Don’t you guys have stuff to do? Ya know, like being doctors or something?”
He laughed as his mom smacked him on the arm, but he could see her trying not to smile as she handed him his duffel bag. “I love you guys.”
“We love you too, honey.”
He closed his eyes with a smile and started to chant, wishing to be back where he belonged. Back where he could see his friends everyday and sleep curled up against Teddy. He felt the magic wrap around him in a burst and when it faded he could tell her was somewhere else. He opened his eyes and let out a happy sigh at the sight of his room, Teddy’s side still neat and orderly while his was a slightly neater mess (Teddy must of shoved his clothes into piles). He tossed his duffle bag on the floor and frowned at the two separate beds, walking over to the side of his and bent down to start pushing.
Oof. He was able to get the bed going at an angle and sighed as he sat back. “Gunna need Teddy after all.”
Even though Teddy was in a better mood than he'd been in a long time, he still wasn't able to concentrate at all that morning. He kept looking at the clock, checking his phone surreptitiously, even when that got him the stink-eye from his teachers. Second period over he couldn't take it any longer and he practically bolted for his room. Billy hadn't given him an exact time, but it was supposed to be this morning, and the wait was making him a little bit crazy.
He probably should be a lot more concerned about that, really. They'd only been apart a week, and even then they'd been talking constantly, but everything had been so upside down since Limbo... it didn't mean that he was too hung up on Billy, did it? Even if it did, did that really matter?
No, he decided, jogging down the dorm hall. He was allowed to be excited to see his boyfriend, even if enthusiasm was somehow less than cool. Was that noise from inside? Teddy opened the door, and a smile split his face wide. He headed in, dropping his bag and making a beeline (heh) for Billy. "You're back!"
When he heard the door open Billy turned to look and couldn’t help the large grin from forming on his face as he saw Teddy. He quickly pushed himself to his feet, opening his mouth to say that he was back only to be grabbed, hoisted up in the air with Teddy’s ridiculous strength and kissed. Billy wasted no time, not even caring that their door was still kind of open, as he wrapped his arms around Teddy’s neck and kissed him back. He pulled back with a gasp and laughed breathlessly. “Miss me much?”
He leaned down to press soft kisses to Teddy’s cheeks, nose and eyelids, a little drunk on the feeling of being back in Teddy’s arms.
This was better, this was so much better than all of those long silences and dark moods, the faint greetings that had left him wondering -- so unfairly -- if Billy even cared for him anymore. Teddy buried his face in Billy's neck, his arms locked securely under his butt, Billy's kisses making everything all right with the world.
The door was still open and Teddy nudged it closed with his foot, still grinning like an idiot when he lifted his head again. "Hmm," he pretended to consider the question. "Nope. Not at all. Certainly not the entire time you were gone, or anything hopeless like that."
“Oh yeah, sure.” Billy laughed, lacing his fingers together behind Teddy’s head and moving so he could lean his forehead against his boyfriend’s with a soft sigh. It felt like he was actually here now, in body and mind, and he could enjoy this again without his thoughts going dark. “God, I missed you. Texting and the phone weren't enough.”
He closed his eyes as he took a deep breath, knowing what he was about to say was long over due and that made him the worst. “Teddy...I’m so sorry for all of that. I know that I couldn't help the depression, but I could have gotten help a lot sooner and because I was stubborn, you suffered.”
That was definitely a sign that things were going to be different. Two weeks ago Billy would have taken his head off for even suggesting that there was something wrong, and now to apologize for it-- still, that didn't sit right either. "You just said it yourself -- you couldn't help it." Teddy brought one hand up to brush Billy's hair back from his eyes, the dark tangle like silk in his fingers. "I wouldn't be mad at you for getting... I dunno. The flu. I'd be annoyed if you puked on my shoes because of it," he did amend, "but that's not the same thing as needing to apologize for getting sick in the first place. And I think I've driven this analogy entirely into the ground."
Billy opened his eyes to give Teddy a dubious look, but it kind of failed due to their faces being so close so he just shook his head slightly. “The metaphor is kinda weak. I purposefully refused to get help because I thought I would be fine. I watched you break your back to try to help me and Nick at the same time,” Billy took a deep breath, not liking the sickly guilt that pooled in his stomach. “And I didn’t do anything about it. I felt bad, but I didn’t try to fix it. That was shitty of me.”
"Hey, none of that." Teddy set Billy back down on the ground, not to get rid of him, but to get his other hand free. He slipped that one into Billy's hair as well, cupping his face between Teddy's hands. "No spiralling down into wherever it is you go when you're feeling bad about stuff. You just got back, and you're doing better, and all of that is behind us now." It was partly a statement, but also partly a question. It is all going to be okay now, right?
Billy reached up to cover Teddy’s hand with his, loving how big and warm Teddy’s hands were. He turned his head to kiss the outside of Teddy’s palm and wished he could tell Teddy that none of that would ever happen again, that his depression was cured forever. He swallowed and glanced up at Teddy in worry, nervous about how he would take what Billy had to say. “I can’t promise that I won’t ever feel like that again, something might happen or my body might change so that the medication might not work as well.”
He took a steadying breath and looked at Teddy with determination. “But, I can promise that if that does happen, I will immediately tell my doctor so that we can find something that will work again.”
"That's fair." Teddy nodded, even as he tried to banish the fear that Billy would start slipping away again right in front of him. He'd begged Billy to trust him - it had to go both ways. "And if I notice something changing, I can check in with you and see how you're doing without hurting your feelings?"
And that was the thing. He needed to be able to listen when people around him noticed something was off and not get upset if it was brought to attention. Billy gave a slow nod, then a more forceful one to show that he wouldn’t let that happen again. “Yes. If you notice something, I want you to tell me. Talk with me about it. It maybe be something or it may be nothing, but I think bringing it to my attention is good.”
Billy turned his head to kiss Teddy’s palm again. “I’m going to do my very best not to put us through that again.”
Billy's lips brushed warm against his skin and shivers coursed along Teddy's skin at the contact. The conversation was important, obviously -- super-important. But it had become a whole lot less interesting. "I know you will," he murmured, very aware of Billy's nearness in a way he hadn't been for a while. He still had Billy's face cupped between his palms, so it was easy to hold Billy steady and duck his head down, press his lips to Billy's. Starving, he was starving and desperately thirsty, and Billy his oasis in the desert.
Billy was so okay with this turn of events, wanting Teddy to know he was really going to try, but also he hadn’t been near his boyfriend in a week. With his sex drive back in full force, Billy surged up on his tip toes so he could deepen the kiss, arms quickly snaking around Teddy’s neck to hold him there. He didn’t care if he seemed needy as he ran his tongue boldly over the seam of Teddy’s lips to ask for more.
How could he have not wanted this? How could he have not wanted to kiss every inch of skin on Teddy’s body all the time? Fuck his depressed ass self, they were crazy.
Everything else fled Teddy's mind, his body responding to Billy in ways that left no room for doubts or even coherent thought. He opened to Billy, tasted him in return, rediscovering the shape of his mouth, the small sounds he made in his throat. They had some time now, and privacy -- no-one but him knew Billy was back yet, so no-one was likely to come looking for them. The best of all the wicked thoughts Teddy'd been having over the past few weeks resurfaced, and now he didn't have to try and push them away.
"I have been," Teddy murmured against Billy's lips, breaking the kiss. "Thinking about this-" He dropped his hands from Billy's face to his shoulders and started gently steering him so that in a matter of a couple of steps, Billy's back would be up against the wall. "For weeks."
“Oh thank god.” Billy groaned, greedily pulling Teddy back down for another kiss when his back hit the wall. He had been nervous, so nervous that because he didn’t want to do anything that Teddy would feel unwanted and start looking for a way out. Find someone better, not broken, someone who could give him the attention he deserved instead Billy who snapped at him and broke every promise he made. Billy’s breath hitched and his throat tightened at the thought, but he covered it by biting down on Teddy’s lower lip gently. Teddy still wanted him, still wanted to be with him and it made Billy want to cry in relief.
He also couldn’t remember the last time he had been so turned on. He pulled away with a soft laugh and grinned up at Teddy. “Once I started feeling things again, you were busy putting on quite the show in my head. How do you feel about lingerie and garters?”
Teddy had been focusing tight on the bright sparking ache of Billy's teeth on his lip, the hot skin of Billy's stomach as he ran his hands up under the hem of Billy's shirt, on how long he could possibly hold out before he gave in and dropped to his knees in front of Billy right there- He stopped mid-explore with a surprised laugh. "On you, or me?" he teased, biting his way down the tight tendon along the side of Billy's throat. "This is what comes from watching Rocky Horror too many times in your formative years."
Billy’s sarcastic laugh quickly turned into a moan at being bitten. Jesus Christ that was amazing! He pushed his shoulders back against the wall so he could rock his hips forward against Teddy’s in retaliation, pleasure spiking in his stomach at the contact. Aw man, he wasn’t going to make it long. “And what exactly were your fantasies, huh?”
To heck with trying to hold off. Billy certainly didn't seem like he was about to complain. "About to live 'em right now." He paused, lips against Billy's sternum, and looked up at Billy, holding eye contact even as he headed down. "Assuming you don't mind, of course," he added politely, though his grin was wicked.
Billy was surprised he had any brain cells left in his head as he watched where Teddy was headed with that look. He grinned when Teddy was on his knees, cupping Teddy’s jaw and moving to press his thumb against the plush part of Teddy’s lower lip. “Oh, yeah. I super mind doing anything sexual with my fantastic boyfriend. Watch me mind.”
He let his hands trail into Teddy’s hair and grip tight.
Billy let out a content sigh, naked limbs spread across their double bed while Teddy laid out right beside him. This was right, this was how things were supposed to be. He could feel a stupid goofy smile come onto his face as he rolled on top of the other and beam down at him.
“Hey.” He whispered, giving Teddy a soft kiss on the lips, then nose. His lips tingled and his jaw ached, but watching Teddy come undone had been more than worth it. He loved this boy. He loved him loved him loved him loved him! Billy leaned to press his mouth against Teddy’s again and mouthed the words softly against his lips.
Still floating on a cloud of euphoria, Teddy wrapped his arms around Billy and held on tight. The year had started off shitty, but today -- he wanted to hold on to this specific feeling forever. He kissed Billy back, moving to make space for Billy's legs to slot between his, and feeling rather than hearing the phrase on his lips.
His heart was too full of feelings, and they were spilling out all over the place without Teddy even being brave enough to give them a name. It was that, wasn't it? They were all symptoms - the soul-deep ache when Billy was hurting, the way he felt a dozen times better when Billy entered a room, the craving he felt for Billy's company, his laugh, and yeah, his touch. Whatever it was, it was more everything than anything he'd felt before. Could that be nothing more than infatuation? Really?
Still, the idea of saying the words scared him. He kissed Billy again, brushed his thumb along the sharply angled sweep of Billy's cheekbone, met his dark, warm gaze and held it. "You know, right?" Teddy did say, softly so as not to break the fragile bubble of the perfect moment. "I don't have to say it?"
He hadn’t really said it, not really, but the way Billy’s heart thudded against his chest like it was a stampede of wild buffalo made it seem like it didn’t care about actual words. His smile became wobbly and he refused to cry in front of Teddy because he was happy, propping himself up on his elbows so he could look down at the other.
“Yeah.” He whispered, his throat choking the words a little. How could he doubt after this past month? How could he think Teddy didn’t feel the same for him even if he couldn’t say it? He couldn’t. Teddy’s actions screamed love, and he leaned down to kiss the other so Teddy wouldn’t notice how damp his eyes were. “Yeah, you’re good. I got it.”
Teddy wanted to say the words but they stuck in his throat, too big and too terrifying to let out. Billy knew, though; he knew and he saved Teddy from himself again, absolution and forgiveness in his kisses. Words were too hard when things were this important, the right ones elusive and the wrong ones blunt weapons. Kissing he could do, though. They were getting pretty good at this part.
"Welcome back," he did say after a little while, luxuriating in the weight of Billy's body on top of his. "Just -- don't think that you have to go away again to get this kind of homecoming party, k?" He smiled, to show he was (mostly) teasing, and kissed the end of Billy's nose.
“Oh?” Billy grinned, propping himself up on his elbows, trapping Teddy’s head between them so he could look down at other. “Then is it really a homecoming party? Wouldn’t it be more like a ‘Yay! You came back from the bathroom’ party? Which I mean hey, if you wanna do that everytime I leave the room, I’m super on board. Just let me know.”
He let his hands move into Teddy’s hair while his elbows took his weight and let his blunt bitten nails scratch at Teddy’s scalp.
If Teddy could purr, he would. He let his eyes close instead and tipped his head back in bliss. "That would be awesome. Super-awkward when we have friends in the room, mind you."
Teddy looked so good with his head tipped back like that and he leaned down to kiss Teddy’s exposed throat softly. “Well, they’ll just have to get used to it. They need to know what to expect when we see each other after being part for ten minutes.”
"I'm pretty sure we're already 'that couple,' just for the record. The one people roll their eyes at because we're kind of sickening."
Billy couldn’t help but laugh at that, smothering his laugh in Teddy's neck before giving it a soft bite. Man, he had missed this. “Oh, I’m sure we are that couple.” He said against the skin he’d marked, watching it fade back to fair pink in no time. “Honestly, I don’t mind being that couple. When I saw them at my old school I thought, really? But now I get it. Wanting to be around the person who makes you happy is just kind of human nature isn’t it?”
The thought itself was intoxicating, and another wave of gratitude washed over Teddy. Not only was Billy back, and sounding like his old self, he'd forgiven Teddy for interfering and he still loved him - Teddy was still the one who made him happy. He'd have been thankful for any one of those, but all together was a gift. "It helps when the person is as amazing as you," he said, leaving his head tipped back so Billy could keep on doing that.
Billy didn’t stop scratching Teddy’s scalp, but he did raise a questioning eyebrow at those words. Amazing people didn’t drag their loved ones through hell with them just because they were stubborn nor did they snap at them when they were only trying to help, but he kept his mouth shut. “I’m glad you think so. You aren’t too bad yourself, ya know?”
He pressed a kiss to Teddy’s upturned chin, wanting to make up for all the time he wanted nothing to do with physical contact. “Thank you for sticking with me, Tee. I’m serious. You had every right to just give up on me or walk away, but you didn’t and that means a lot to me.”
Teddy cracked one eye open and smiled up at Billy's too-serious expression. They'd been too serious for too many weeks; he needed to see a smile back on Billy's face. Needed it like air. "We live together," he pointed out, his smile turning to teasing. "It's not like I can just block your number and drop a box of your stuff off at your door."
Billy frowned, but it wasn’t serious and he leaned over so he he could nip at the tip of Teddy’s nose lightly. He could take a hint so he shut up. “Yeah yeah. As if blocking my number would stop me even if we didn't live together. I’m not that easy to get rid of. Except I don’t know if I could go completely stalker, that takes a lot of work and I’m really lazy. Would you settle for a few late night calls and maybe some pictures of you in my room if I could ever figure out the printer?”
"What, no shrine?" Teddy laughed, then let things get more sombre again, just for a moment. "I'm not walking away, k? Not then, and not ever. I know I made you nuts," he apologized sheepishly, "And I don't know what I'm doing most of the time, but even if it comes out clumsy, I'm never going to give up on you when you need me."
Billy bent down low so he could bury his face in Teddy’s neck and groan, slapping Teddy on the opposite shoulder weakly as he did. “You butt.” He grumbled. “You can’t go saying great things like that. I’m vulnerable right now, I’m more likely to get soppy on you if you talk like that.”
Teddy had trouble saying the L word, but had just said he’d never leave Billy. Oh geeze. How was Teddy real?
"You love my butt," Teddy replied, half-giddy and grinning like an idiot.
“Ugh. You’re so cocky.” Billy pulled his head up and tried to look disgusted, but it only lasted for a second before he was grinning. “How’s that butt I love feel about getting some pants on so we can get food? My mom tried to shove a five-course meal down my throat before I left, but I was too nervous to even take a sip of orange juice so of course now I’m starving. You’re little fun welcome home party didn’t help.”
He stuck out his tongue and pulled his hands away from Teddy’s head.
"So. Many. Possible jokes," Teddy groaned, his smile wide and laughter in his voice. "I can't choose. Do I stay easy with the low-hanging fruit and riff on 'cocky,'" he asked aloud, "or go for broke and dive into all that innuendo about being starving and having things shoved down your-?"
Billy didn’t think he could roll his eyes hard enough, but he tried and punched Teddy lightly in the shoulder as he tried to hide his amusement. “Inappropriate, Mr. Altman. How dare you twist my words into that.”
He leaned down to capture Teddy’s lips, humming happily as he quickly turned it filthy and rocked his hips down best he could against Teddy’s with a soft gasp. He pulled back after a bit, eyes hooded as he licked his lips and grinned. “Get your head out of the gutter, Tee.”
Then he rolled away and off the bed.
Teddy was one-hundred percent behind everything Billy was doing, until the moment he rolled away. Teddy flopped over onto his stomach in a half-hearted attempt to catch him, reaching out plaintively as Billy got to his feet and sauntered away. Teddy let his hand flop back down to the bed and he let out a faintly frustrated whimper, just so Billy would know. "You're cruel and terrible," Teddy accused him, laughing.
“Oh, you didn’t know?” Billy bent down to get a jacket out of one of his packed duffles. He pulled out the overly large green striped zip hoodie that hadn’t started out as his and grinned. Perfect He pulled it on and shot Teddy wink. “The meds help make me feel better, but also boosts my confidence so now I can finally become the evil villain I always dreamed of. First on my evil list is be a tease.”
"Mission accomplished." Teddy propped himself up on his elbows and watched Billy, taking in the sight of those ridiculous legs of his, and the total lack of pants- He frowned. "Is that my hoodie? I was looking for that!"
“Erm, excuse me? I stole it, so I’m pretty sure it’s mine.” He grinned moving over to find his pants that had been tossed, quickly shoving his legs into them and buttoning them with ease. He walked back over to the bed and crawled on, leaning over to give Teddy a sweet kiss. “Your stuff is more comfortable anyway, smells like you. Except not anymore, kinda been sleeping with this guy for a few days.”
"I'm not sure whether to be flattered, charmed or vaguely disgusted." Teddy leaned over and kissed him back. "Tell me your mom at least did your laundry."
“Oh, sweetie. Are you put off by dirty clothes? You think I let my mom touch this thing at all this week?” Billy raised an eyebrow, humming as he placed a few more kisses along Teddy’s the side of his neck and bare shoulder. God, his skin was so smooth. Guess healing meant no need for lotion either. He grinned against the warm skin and gave it a bite. “Just kidding. She made me wash it after the third day of being there.”
"Trust me, that's for the best." Teddy tipped his head back and nuzzled Billy's ear, in no hurry to get up. But- "Did you call me 'sweetie'?" he asked, faintly disturbed.
Billy snorted, grinning as he mushed his face against Teddy’s shoulder. “Oh? What you didn’t like it? Want something better? Like...honey bear? Sugar drop? Lovely bunches? My sun? My moon? My basherter!”
Billy looked up, barely able to contain his laughter. “Want to be my destiny?”
"Your 'bullshitter'? What?" Teddy laughed, knowing he hadn't nailed the unfamiliar word, but coming as close as he could. He reached up and ruffled Billy's hair -- what he could reach of it anyway, with Billy half-draped over his back. "And 'destiny's really sweet in concept, but as a nickname - eh. It sounds like I'm a pole dancer." They'd fallen into shortening each other's nicknames pretty easily, but nothing else quite felt right.
Billy couldn’t help cracking up at Teddy’s butchering of the word, sliding off his boyfriend’s back to lay down next to him on his side, head propped up on his hand. “If you were a pole dancer, I’d be broke in one night. I fell in love with Destiny and he took all my money.”
He giggled like a fool and shook his head. “Mmmm...nah. I think I like Tee best. Tee or maybe babe. Maybe.”
Teddy shook his head, but he couldn't help laughing. "Man, you're wired today. Is this the new-and-improved version, or are you really just that giddy to be back?" He smoothed his hand down Billy's spine, settled his palm in the curve at the small of Billy's back.
“Wired? Is that a joke about my electricity?” Billy chuckled as he reached out to tug gently on the small silver hoops of Teddy’s ears, surprised by the pang of how much he missed doing that. “Sorry, I can dial back the energy if you’d like. Just missed you, us,” he motioned to them laying in bed. “This.”
"I'll take that answer." Teddy leaned in and pressed a kiss against Billy's temple, breathing him in. Just, all of him -- his shampoo and the unfamiliar scent of a different laundry detergent and all. "And don't change. Don't change for anyone, least of all me. Just be you. However you're feeling today."
Billy hummed happily at the affection, scooting himself closer so he could press up against Teddy’s side. “If you say so, then I won’t.” He laid there quietly, closing his eyes so he could listen to the sounds of their quiet room and Teddy’s breathing. “I’m hungry and I promised I would go to my afternoon classes, but now I don’t want to leave.”
Teddy curled up against him, but a guilty conscience caught up with him a few seconds later. "Pants," he sighed, kissed Billy one last time and forced himself to sit up. "Yeah. We should get food, and don't you dare skip class on your first day back. I'm not going to run the risk of your parents dragging you home again. Not when you've only just gotten back. Because we'll be back here together tonight. And tomorrow. And after that."
The idea of going back to class and hearing how much he would have to work to not flunk out sounded gross. Billy groaned dramatically and buried his face in Teddy’s pillow, letting the fabric cut off his air flow for a few seconds before he lifted his head with a gasp. “Fine! Fine. You have a point.”
He rolled off their bed (their bed again) and moved to get his socks and shoes back on. “Um, hey, does the offer still stand on helping me with some of my class work? Cause, I absolutely know I’m going to need it, now that I have my head out of my ass.”
He shoved his feet into his shoes, not bothering to tie them, and moved over to take Teddy’s hand. “You can totally say no by the way. I get it.”
Standing and halfway through pulling his pants back on, Teddy ignored his buttons and tangled his fingers with Billy's instead. "Of course I'll help. And for entirely selfish reasons too, so don't feel guilty. Once you get caught up we'll have a lot more time to goof off again."
That brought a grin to Billy’s face and he unwound their hands so he could button and zip Teddy’s pants for him. “Well, then I’m all for selfish motives. As long as they get me more time to doing nothing with you, then selfish it up please.”
He let his arms slide around Teddy’s waist so his hands could slip into Teddy’s back pockets and give a squeeze. “We should go.”
"If we must," Teddy sighed, but he kissed Billy's nose with a grin before stepping aside to grab his shirt and haul it back over his head. "Brace yourself," he advised cheerfully, shaking his hair back into some semblance of order. "Everyone keeps asking me when you're going to be back. You're going to get mobbed, Mr. Popular."
“But I don’t wanna be mobbed.” Billy whined, leaning down to grab his book bag and hoisting it up on his shoulder. “I don’t want to have to answer ‘how are you doing’ over and over. I should just write ‘I’m OK’ on my forehead before I go out.”
"Post something on the forums?" Teddy suggested, waiting until Billy was ready and lacing their fingers together. "You know, 'hi, I'm back, it's all good, anyone feel like kicking my butt at MarioKart?'"
Teddy smiled innocently.
“Are you trying to start something, Altman?” Billy gaped, but quickly grinned and tugged on Teddy closer to the door with their linked hands. “Cause I’ll blue shell you into oblivion, just name the time.”
"Hufflepuffs never start fights," Teddy replied, with pious solemnity. At least until the corner of his mouth started twitching upwards.
“Oh no?” Billy raised an eyebrow. “That’s alright because we Slytherins are good at starting them.”
Doing this again, just the back and forth, made Billy feel like he was floating he was so happy. Glancing down to make sure he wasn’t actually floating before giving Teddy one last kiss. “Walk me to class after we eat?”
Teddy smiled. That was an easy one. "Any time."
no subject
Date: 2018-02-21 04:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-02-21 04:55 am (UTC)She does, however, suggest that they start up a Slytherin house at Xaviers. ;)