Lil and Teddy - January 25th
Jan. 25th, 2018 04:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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ax_mainTeddy and Lil get together for some basketball. Turns out basketball is a perfect medium for catch-all conversations between friends.
Something so objectively small shouldn't have had such an impact on Teddy's mood, but he was practically whistling as he headed down the hall toward the gym, spinning the basketball on his finger. It wasn't just the phone call last night, either (though knowing that Billy still wanted him - wanted him enough to initiate that kind of conversation after a month of not much at all, that was huge). It was the 'I'm feeling much better' and the 'probably back to school on Monday' and the realization that they'd made it through the worst. That, and that Teddy had a lot more real friends than he'd realized.
Assuming Lil didn't decide to stop talking to him after this, of course.
Lil was leaning against the wall of the gym right by the door when she heard someone coming. Might not be Teddy, but chances were that it was so on impulse (because what else was there?) Lil stayed quiet in case there was an opportunity to... do something. A moment later, there was. Teddy stepped into the gym with a basketball spinning on his finger and Lil punched it, sending it bouncing across the gym floor.
She grinned. "There! I win, right?"
Teddy snorted a laugh - once he was over his momentary surprise at the way she'd popped out of nowhere. "If this were MMA, maybe. Are you going to go get that?" And he grinned back to show there were no hard feelings.
Lil sighed and jogged off to retrieve the ball. "If you're gonna insist that my actions have consequences, sure I guess I better get it." She scooped it up and headed back. "MMA, there's a thought. I'd do good in that."
"You'd be terrifying in that," he corrected her cheerfully and met her halfway across the gym floor. “Let me know if you join the circuit, I’ll place some sucker’s bets.”
He snagged the ball from her hands, bouncing it a couple of times. It felt as good in his hand as ever, and not for the first time he felt that pang of regret that Xavier’s didn’t have a team. There was a lot that he didn’t miss about his old school – about 98% of it, really – but the actual playing had been one of the few bright sparks.
"Definitely. You'll make a mint off me." She watched him bounce the ball and it occurred to her there was something lighter about him today. Not that Teddy didn't always try to be upbeat, even when stuff was wearing him down, but this was genuine. "But first, you seem to be in a good mood, and I'm sure as shit it's not just 'cause you get to spend time with me."
"It is," he objected, but obvious lie was obvious, and he flashed her a bright and sunny smile. "I talked to Billy last night." Nothing new there, they'd been talking every night (at least after the first couple, when Billy'd still been peeved with Teddy for ratting him out to his parents). And Teddy was certainly not about to tell her all the details, but there were a few he could share in good conscience.
"He's doing a lot better," Teddy confided happily. "And he's planning to be back at school on Monday." They'd ended up just about at the three-point line, and Teddy bounced the ball once more and fired off a shot. It wasn't clean - the ball bounced off the backboard - but made a very satisfying swish through the hoop anyway. Yeah. Today was a good day
"Awesome!" said Lil, genuinely happy. Maybe she'd only really hung out with him the once, but even though he'd obviously been feeling like shit, he'd welcomed Lil in and been fun to talk to. "If he wants a welcome party let me know. I'll bring him a crapload of ringpops." Lil grinned and ran to retrieve the ball.
Teddy laughed aloud, and moved in to a good position to steal the ball from her if she tried to dribble on the way back. "Maybe give him a day or two to settle back in first? Or who knows -- he might be ready to hit the ground running. I'll check and see how he feels when I see him this weekend."
"Yeah, no problem. You guys should have a couple of days to chill when he gets back anyhow, right?" Damn, this was serious. Teddy wasn't just gonna let her walk up and take a shot. Okay. Lil bounced the ball a few times, tried moving with it, and had to scoop it up again when it got away from her. "Fuck. You know, the last time I played this friggin' game was when I was 11."
He relaxed, the strategic stance something he'd slipped into almost out of habit, and he nodded. "I'll take it easy on you," Teddy promised, holding up his hands in easy, good-humoured surrender. "Did you want a refresher?" he eyed the way she was trying to control the ball, and rethought. "Or lessons from scratch?"
Lil chuckled. "That bad, am I? From scratch I guess. Me and sports never got along much." She walked over to Teddy, ball in hand. "Except like, Muskox Push and Back Push and stuff, but that's Inuit stuff a friend showed me so... don't think there's a league down here."
"I've never heard of those games," Teddy admitted, "So I'm going to guess not so much. And you're not that bad," he reassured her. "But I'm betting you're a whole lot taller now than when you were eleven, so a lot of strategy and stuff won't apply the same way."
"You'd know that better than me, but I don't think it'll take too long to get the basic stuff back, eh?" Really, the dribbling had been a disaster, but she'd only given it the one try. A bit of practice and she should be able to handle it. "I'm probably pretty rusty on the rules though."
"Eh. The rules don't matter so much if we're just goofing around. But try taking a shot," Teddy encouraged, "and see how it goes. Like this-" he mimed a decent stance, the same shot he'd taken before. "Eye on the rim, not the net itself, and follow the shot through."
That was familiar, not that she'd played in years but she remembered the feel of standing there under the watchful eye of a gym teacher with the basketball in her hand. Like riding a bike? She took her shot and sent the ball flying until it hit the backboard, way up and to the left of the hoop. She frowned. "Well, that's a start."
"It's a start," Teddy agreed cheerfully, and this time he headed off to grab the ball. There was something pure and easy about just... moving. No stress, no worries, just letting space fit itself around him, this time, instead of the other way around. He scooped up the ball and lobbed it back at her. "So how are you doing this week? I feel like I've been staring at my own navel for days."
Lil caught it easily. "Eh, not bad." She set up another shot, threw and watched as the ball bounced off the rim. Sure it was different from when she was eleven, but there was a familiar feel to this. "Lots of shit happened but I, um, sorta got a chance to figure a bit of it out 'cause... I guess I'm seeing a therapist or something?" Yup, that was frigging embarrassing to say. Lil kept her eyes on the hoop and off Teddy.
Teddy caught himself before he said something super-dumb like 'oh wow,' even though of all the people at school he thought might be comfortable talking to a therapist about stuff... yeah, Lil wouldn't have even been on the list. Still, if it helped- he snagged the ball out of the air as it bounced by. "Oh yeah? Given the crap you've been dealing with the last few months, having someone to talk to who's one-hundred-percent on your side and who you don't have to worry about offending -- that's got to be helpful."
She let herself breath again and smiled at Teddy, the relief at his response obvious in her expression. "Thanks. It really is. I had a talk with the Prof a ways back after I had some trouble with Scott, and he mentioned it and... it seems okay. The dude is okay. He's got powers and one of them is like mine - super tough. We spent half the appointment geeking out over that."
It sounded an awful lot like the guy Billy had talked about, and how many mutant therapists could there be, anyway? Still, that wasn't his secret to tell, so Teddy just nodded. "That sounds pretty good," he offered, firing the ball toward the net. It was a clean shot this time, dropping straight through the net with a deeply satisfying swish. But- "What happened with Scott?" he asked, turning and giving her a quick frown.
"Ugh." Lil rolled her eyes. "I asked him about why Nick was left alone. I didn't even think I was that bad Teddy, honest, but he got patronizing and I did call him out on that... then he told me I 'had issues' with all the guys, and the school and didn't really give a shit about Nick, just had a raging ego or some such shit." Lil laughed, but it had a bitter edge she couldn't exorcise. "I give up. I have to kiss ass for them not to think I'm a bully, but they can shit on me whenever they feel like it. I'm keeping my head down from now on."
Oof. Saying that didn't sound like it had gone well was a major understatement. Teddy didn't know Scott beyond X-Force meetings and training -- and of course what he'd done for Nick -- but he figured he could guess where their personalities had rubbed the wrong way. Neither one of them was the type to suffer fools gladly. "I'm sorry that he said that to you. If he knew you at all, he'd know how far off base he was. 'Raging ego' is definitely not fair." If anything, Lil was as fragile on the inside as she was tough on the outside, and it was that combination that made her kind heart so easy to overlook -- and her temper (he had to admit) so easy to trigger.
He grabbed the ball, spinning it gently between his palms. "But there are a lot of steps between kissing ass and letting them silence you," Teddy said firmly. "I let myself get pushed into a corner like that by someone who thought he had the right to control what I did and how I thought and what I felt. And no matter how small you make yourself, it'll never be enough. Don't fall into that trap." He passed her the ball.
Lil took the ball and gave Teddy a small smile. "You're not gonna get let me just dig a hole and go hide in it, are you? Fine, I'll stop sulking." Trust Teddy to cut through what she was whining about and find the important stuff she'd managed to overlook. Don't fall into the trap. That was going to have to become her mantra. She shook out an arm, lifted the ball, and let it go. The ball hit the rim, and wobbled before tipping into the net. "There you go. I listen to you and the ball goes in."
"I know stuff," he grinned at her. He moved to grab the ball after the first bounce, and fired off a shot from where he was standing. This time it bounced off the rim and back at him, and he couldn't help but laugh at the timing. "Sometimes, anyway. I'm still trying to figure everything out," he confessed, setting up for a better shot. "Having friends-" at all "-who pretend I have useful things to say helps a lot." He grinned at her, then turned back and sent the ball through the hoop again.
Lil jogged over to take the ball before Teddy decided to grab it again and tried tossing it in from close up. Nope. "Honestly, you're the smartest friend I have, Teddy. You speak, I listen. Sorry, that's just the way it is."
"Man, are we ever in trouble." The laugh bubbled out of him. "No, but seriously. I doubt myself and I second-guess everything all the time. All the time. I've spent so much of my life either hiding or trying to fit in to the boxes that other people made for me. You know what changed that?" Teddy didn't wait for her to answer, gesturing to encourage her to take another shot. "You. Nick, in some ways. Billy. Tamara. Living big, with no apologies and - pardon the language - zero fucks given. It made me start to rethink who I wanted to be."
"I feel like I'm putting one over on you now." But as Lil threw the ball she couldn't help the pleased grin that snuck across her face That was quite possibly the biggest compliment she'd ever gotten, and having it come from someone like Teddy, who she didn't just like, but admired, was a bonus. The ball went in. "I mean the whole zero-fucks thing comes back to bite me in the ass a lot. So... um, keep your ass covered? There, you give me advice, I do the same for you."
"Will do," Teddy promised, waiting to see if she'd go for the ball before he moved into her path. His smile turned wry. "It's a fine balance, isn't it? But if I keep trying to trust my own instincts and you work on giving... like... five percent of a fuck, we'll figure out this people thing eventually."
Well, he didn't want the ball so Lil went to grab it again. "Oh, speaking of that five percent I need to give... You know Shen, right? She's okay?"
That was a weird segue, and Teddy reacted with quiet alarm. "The last time I talked to her she was fine! Did something happen?"
"Did something happen? Oh shit, no, sorry Teddy." Damn brain, jumping ahead without a thought for what that would sound like. "I meant okay as in she's good people. I was sort of an asshole when we first met and that giving a fuck thing reminded me I should probably go apologize, I mean if you guys like her plus she's visited Nick... Well, I think I've probably been wrong about her, right? "
"Ohhh, okay. Sorry. I've been a bit jumpy lately, I guess," Teddy admitted sheepishly. "And Shen is definitely good people," he added much more firmly.
He paused for a beat, at war with himself for a moment about how to describe her. "Shen can be intense, and kind of self-righteous, but honestly I think she's allowed. She's not all hot air and petitions -- she really goes out of her way to take care of people. She actually left Gar's party the other day to drag me off and get me to talk and make sure I was doing okay, all because I looked tired. And she gives really good hugs," Teddy added as an afterthought.
"Ugh. Yup, I'm gonna have to talk to her if she's been looking out for you." Another apology to add to her collection, but then she was starting to accept that they were inevitable if she couldn't manage to get temper under control.
At least she'd distracted Teddy long enough to grab the ball. She'd sunk enough that she had a feeling this was going to go from just taking shots to some kind of real competition soon. No doubt Teddy would win, so she'd take whatever advantage she could get.
Lil looked like she was lining up another shot, so Teddy gave her space to take it. "Yeah. She has. Do I want to ask what you guys fought about, or should I leave it alone?"
"You know what? I don't even remember what it was about." Lil held on to the ball as she tried to remember, but there was nothing clear. "It wasn't much of a fight either - she said something, I didn't take it too well, and things just sort of went downhill. That was the only time we talked too so... sorta stupid, right?"
"Not really." She wasn't moving, so Teddy headed in with an eye toward smacking the ball down from between her hands. "She was the first person I met when I got here, and she got right up my nose for 'mansplaining.'" He shrugged expressively. "I'm dead sure she wouldn't have reacted that way if I'd said the exact same thing but been in a girl-shape at the time, but I have enough of a sense of self-preservation not to open that can of worms."
Lil laughed. "Yeah, I think I got torn into for using 'pansy' which, honest-to-god, I didn't know was a slur. I'm such a hick. I thought you called someone a pansy-ass 'cause, you know, flowers are delicate and all that." He was getting closer. "Still, I did call her a pansy-ass, so I gotta fix that with her." On the chance that he was getting serious, Lil stepped back and took her shot. It went way wide. She grinned at Teddy and took off for the ball.
He was too flabbergasted to move for a crucial moment, staring at her all but slack-jawed. "How are you even still alive? No wonder she got pissed." He started moving then, circling around to grab the ball as it bounced off the back wall. "Honestly I'd have been pissed, too. That's definitely not a word to throw around. We need to get you reading Urban Dictionary or something. Americanize your vocabulary," he added with a grin.
Lil slowed down when she realized Teddy had the ball. Also, her face was turning bright red over the whole misunderstanding and a moment to take a breath before letting him see that was required. That it would upset Shen was one thing, but that Teddy would be offended was a whole 'nother realm of embarrassing. "Shit, I guess so. It was just a word that people tossed around back home, and I never gave it much thought. Maybe it does mean the same thing there and I just never put two and two together."
"Yeah," Teddy said, a little more seriously than he had been before. "I'm pretty sure it does." He started dribbling, slowly, deliberately, and moving toward the net. It practically screamed 'come steal the ball.' Maybe she'd bite. "It's not the worst thing I've ever been called, mind you. And it's definitely not something you hear a lot down here. But you're better off coming up with some more creative insults. I like those Shakespeare insult generators - ever seen those?"
Okay, the whole slur talk had been painful, but at least it seemed to have made Teddy slow down a bit. "Naw, not my style. I think I'll just stick with the classics. Can't go wrong with 'asshole' or 'fucker'." She picked up speed and ran at Teddy, ready to steal the ball.
She was going for it, coming at him faster than most guys usually did, and for a second Teddy wondered if she remembered that basketball was a non-tackle sport. Still, he was fast on his feet too. He spun away from her as she came at him, keeping his body between her and the ball. Classic fake-out. He put on a burst of speed and doubled around her back, heading for the basket.
"Bastard!" Lil yelled, trying very hard not to laugh. "That's a classic too!" She already corrected course, but didn't have a hope in hell of getting in front of him to block the ball.
"Gotta be prepared," Teddy fired back cheerfully. Everything was lining up just right, the shot feeling good as it left his hands. He barely had to look to know that it was going to drop straight through, no fuss. He let out a deeply ungracious whoop, but it didn't make up for the noise of the crowd at a real game. Too bad he'd never actually play varsity now. "There's a lot to like about Xavier's," he said wistfully, "but the sports program here stinks."
Lil gave Teddy a small smile. She didn't miss the tone in his voice. "Hey, I know it's not much, but I'm up for this anytime you want. Maybe we can find a few more people?"
The ball was coming back in his direction and he didn't have to go too far to grab it again. "That'd be good, actually. I've got to try and convince Billy to play. Having a sport is supposed to be good for your mood," he finished firmly. "Adrenaline, endorphins, all that stuff." Billy'd done... track at his old school, that was it, and the irony considering the split between his and Tommy's powers made that kind of funny. But he definitely hadn't been doing wind sprints or anything like that since he'd gotten here.
"Or you just leave helping Billy out of this," Lil suggested. "Everything's been about Billy for the last little while, right? If he wants to play, sure, but maybe it's not so bad to have something to yourself where you don't have to worry about him."
Teddy felt the tips of his ears go warm with an embarrassed flush that thankfully didn't make it all the way to his cheeks. "I've been kind of monofocused lately, I guess," he replied sheepishly. He had things of his own... not many, especially considering he and Billy were usually in each others' back pockets ninety percent of the time, but some.
"Yeah, I noticed, but I was there with Nick. And... I been on the other side too." Lil winced at the memory. She'd been there in different ways for years, on and off, and her mom had been firmly stuck in Teddy's position. "Do some stuff to have fun on your own. Billy needs to know you're good, plus if he's getting better, he needs some room to figure out some of that himself. Gets to feel sorta... like you're a baby? When you don't have that room I mean." She sighed. "If that made any sense. I'm not good at this stuff."
"No, I think I get what you're saying." At least he probably did. It kind of fit with some things Billy had said, though Teddy still wasn't sure how much of it he meant and how much had been intended to stop Teddy from hovering in general. Maybe they were the same thing. "You went through something like this?" She'd hinted at it before but he hadn't wanted to pry, but it was just the two of them in the gym now, and she could tell him to back off if she needed to.
The ball game had com to a complete stop, so Lil walked over to Teddy. "School. Like, all of it. It was no friends, then a bad friend, then a dead bad friend so... yeah. Probably why I'm so prickly - I keep waiting for the normal shit to start falling again. But you know," Lil reached out and snatched the ball from Teddy, "You don't have to look after me either. I'll tell you about it later, but right now I'm supposed to be practicing so I can beat the everliving crap out of you at this game, right?"
He wanted to object, to tell her that looking out for each other was what friends did, but in the end what did he actually know about healthy friendships? He had things to think about later, anyway. So Teddy shrugged it off and flashed Lil a bright grin. "Something like that, but I think you have the end result reversed."
Lil grinned and backed away from him. "For now, but I'm watching every move you make. One of these days you're gonna get beaten by a girl." With that, she turned and took off for the net.
"Girl' isn't a problem." Teddy laughed and took off after her, shifting into girl-shape as he went to punctuate the reply. "But I'll be damned if I'm ever gonna get beaten by a Canadian."
Something so objectively small shouldn't have had such an impact on Teddy's mood, but he was practically whistling as he headed down the hall toward the gym, spinning the basketball on his finger. It wasn't just the phone call last night, either (though knowing that Billy still wanted him - wanted him enough to initiate that kind of conversation after a month of not much at all, that was huge). It was the 'I'm feeling much better' and the 'probably back to school on Monday' and the realization that they'd made it through the worst. That, and that Teddy had a lot more real friends than he'd realized.
Assuming Lil didn't decide to stop talking to him after this, of course.
Lil was leaning against the wall of the gym right by the door when she heard someone coming. Might not be Teddy, but chances were that it was so on impulse (because what else was there?) Lil stayed quiet in case there was an opportunity to... do something. A moment later, there was. Teddy stepped into the gym with a basketball spinning on his finger and Lil punched it, sending it bouncing across the gym floor.
She grinned. "There! I win, right?"
Teddy snorted a laugh - once he was over his momentary surprise at the way she'd popped out of nowhere. "If this were MMA, maybe. Are you going to go get that?" And he grinned back to show there were no hard feelings.
Lil sighed and jogged off to retrieve the ball. "If you're gonna insist that my actions have consequences, sure I guess I better get it." She scooped it up and headed back. "MMA, there's a thought. I'd do good in that."
"You'd be terrifying in that," he corrected her cheerfully and met her halfway across the gym floor. “Let me know if you join the circuit, I’ll place some sucker’s bets.”
He snagged the ball from her hands, bouncing it a couple of times. It felt as good in his hand as ever, and not for the first time he felt that pang of regret that Xavier’s didn’t have a team. There was a lot that he didn’t miss about his old school – about 98% of it, really – but the actual playing had been one of the few bright sparks.
"Definitely. You'll make a mint off me." She watched him bounce the ball and it occurred to her there was something lighter about him today. Not that Teddy didn't always try to be upbeat, even when stuff was wearing him down, but this was genuine. "But first, you seem to be in a good mood, and I'm sure as shit it's not just 'cause you get to spend time with me."
"It is," he objected, but obvious lie was obvious, and he flashed her a bright and sunny smile. "I talked to Billy last night." Nothing new there, they'd been talking every night (at least after the first couple, when Billy'd still been peeved with Teddy for ratting him out to his parents). And Teddy was certainly not about to tell her all the details, but there were a few he could share in good conscience.
"He's doing a lot better," Teddy confided happily. "And he's planning to be back at school on Monday." They'd ended up just about at the three-point line, and Teddy bounced the ball once more and fired off a shot. It wasn't clean - the ball bounced off the backboard - but made a very satisfying swish through the hoop anyway. Yeah. Today was a good day
"Awesome!" said Lil, genuinely happy. Maybe she'd only really hung out with him the once, but even though he'd obviously been feeling like shit, he'd welcomed Lil in and been fun to talk to. "If he wants a welcome party let me know. I'll bring him a crapload of ringpops." Lil grinned and ran to retrieve the ball.
Teddy laughed aloud, and moved in to a good position to steal the ball from her if she tried to dribble on the way back. "Maybe give him a day or two to settle back in first? Or who knows -- he might be ready to hit the ground running. I'll check and see how he feels when I see him this weekend."
"Yeah, no problem. You guys should have a couple of days to chill when he gets back anyhow, right?" Damn, this was serious. Teddy wasn't just gonna let her walk up and take a shot. Okay. Lil bounced the ball a few times, tried moving with it, and had to scoop it up again when it got away from her. "Fuck. You know, the last time I played this friggin' game was when I was 11."
He relaxed, the strategic stance something he'd slipped into almost out of habit, and he nodded. "I'll take it easy on you," Teddy promised, holding up his hands in easy, good-humoured surrender. "Did you want a refresher?" he eyed the way she was trying to control the ball, and rethought. "Or lessons from scratch?"
Lil chuckled. "That bad, am I? From scratch I guess. Me and sports never got along much." She walked over to Teddy, ball in hand. "Except like, Muskox Push and Back Push and stuff, but that's Inuit stuff a friend showed me so... don't think there's a league down here."
"I've never heard of those games," Teddy admitted, "So I'm going to guess not so much. And you're not that bad," he reassured her. "But I'm betting you're a whole lot taller now than when you were eleven, so a lot of strategy and stuff won't apply the same way."
"You'd know that better than me, but I don't think it'll take too long to get the basic stuff back, eh?" Really, the dribbling had been a disaster, but she'd only given it the one try. A bit of practice and she should be able to handle it. "I'm probably pretty rusty on the rules though."
"Eh. The rules don't matter so much if we're just goofing around. But try taking a shot," Teddy encouraged, "and see how it goes. Like this-" he mimed a decent stance, the same shot he'd taken before. "Eye on the rim, not the net itself, and follow the shot through."
That was familiar, not that she'd played in years but she remembered the feel of standing there under the watchful eye of a gym teacher with the basketball in her hand. Like riding a bike? She took her shot and sent the ball flying until it hit the backboard, way up and to the left of the hoop. She frowned. "Well, that's a start."
"It's a start," Teddy agreed cheerfully, and this time he headed off to grab the ball. There was something pure and easy about just... moving. No stress, no worries, just letting space fit itself around him, this time, instead of the other way around. He scooped up the ball and lobbed it back at her. "So how are you doing this week? I feel like I've been staring at my own navel for days."
Lil caught it easily. "Eh, not bad." She set up another shot, threw and watched as the ball bounced off the rim. Sure it was different from when she was eleven, but there was a familiar feel to this. "Lots of shit happened but I, um, sorta got a chance to figure a bit of it out 'cause... I guess I'm seeing a therapist or something?" Yup, that was frigging embarrassing to say. Lil kept her eyes on the hoop and off Teddy.
Teddy caught himself before he said something super-dumb like 'oh wow,' even though of all the people at school he thought might be comfortable talking to a therapist about stuff... yeah, Lil wouldn't have even been on the list. Still, if it helped- he snagged the ball out of the air as it bounced by. "Oh yeah? Given the crap you've been dealing with the last few months, having someone to talk to who's one-hundred-percent on your side and who you don't have to worry about offending -- that's got to be helpful."
She let herself breath again and smiled at Teddy, the relief at his response obvious in her expression. "Thanks. It really is. I had a talk with the Prof a ways back after I had some trouble with Scott, and he mentioned it and... it seems okay. The dude is okay. He's got powers and one of them is like mine - super tough. We spent half the appointment geeking out over that."
It sounded an awful lot like the guy Billy had talked about, and how many mutant therapists could there be, anyway? Still, that wasn't his secret to tell, so Teddy just nodded. "That sounds pretty good," he offered, firing the ball toward the net. It was a clean shot this time, dropping straight through the net with a deeply satisfying swish. But- "What happened with Scott?" he asked, turning and giving her a quick frown.
"Ugh." Lil rolled her eyes. "I asked him about why Nick was left alone. I didn't even think I was that bad Teddy, honest, but he got patronizing and I did call him out on that... then he told me I 'had issues' with all the guys, and the school and didn't really give a shit about Nick, just had a raging ego or some such shit." Lil laughed, but it had a bitter edge she couldn't exorcise. "I give up. I have to kiss ass for them not to think I'm a bully, but they can shit on me whenever they feel like it. I'm keeping my head down from now on."
Oof. Saying that didn't sound like it had gone well was a major understatement. Teddy didn't know Scott beyond X-Force meetings and training -- and of course what he'd done for Nick -- but he figured he could guess where their personalities had rubbed the wrong way. Neither one of them was the type to suffer fools gladly. "I'm sorry that he said that to you. If he knew you at all, he'd know how far off base he was. 'Raging ego' is definitely not fair." If anything, Lil was as fragile on the inside as she was tough on the outside, and it was that combination that made her kind heart so easy to overlook -- and her temper (he had to admit) so easy to trigger.
He grabbed the ball, spinning it gently between his palms. "But there are a lot of steps between kissing ass and letting them silence you," Teddy said firmly. "I let myself get pushed into a corner like that by someone who thought he had the right to control what I did and how I thought and what I felt. And no matter how small you make yourself, it'll never be enough. Don't fall into that trap." He passed her the ball.
Lil took the ball and gave Teddy a small smile. "You're not gonna get let me just dig a hole and go hide in it, are you? Fine, I'll stop sulking." Trust Teddy to cut through what she was whining about and find the important stuff she'd managed to overlook. Don't fall into the trap. That was going to have to become her mantra. She shook out an arm, lifted the ball, and let it go. The ball hit the rim, and wobbled before tipping into the net. "There you go. I listen to you and the ball goes in."
"I know stuff," he grinned at her. He moved to grab the ball after the first bounce, and fired off a shot from where he was standing. This time it bounced off the rim and back at him, and he couldn't help but laugh at the timing. "Sometimes, anyway. I'm still trying to figure everything out," he confessed, setting up for a better shot. "Having friends-" at all "-who pretend I have useful things to say helps a lot." He grinned at her, then turned back and sent the ball through the hoop again.
Lil jogged over to take the ball before Teddy decided to grab it again and tried tossing it in from close up. Nope. "Honestly, you're the smartest friend I have, Teddy. You speak, I listen. Sorry, that's just the way it is."
"Man, are we ever in trouble." The laugh bubbled out of him. "No, but seriously. I doubt myself and I second-guess everything all the time. All the time. I've spent so much of my life either hiding or trying to fit in to the boxes that other people made for me. You know what changed that?" Teddy didn't wait for her to answer, gesturing to encourage her to take another shot. "You. Nick, in some ways. Billy. Tamara. Living big, with no apologies and - pardon the language - zero fucks given. It made me start to rethink who I wanted to be."
"I feel like I'm putting one over on you now." But as Lil threw the ball she couldn't help the pleased grin that snuck across her face That was quite possibly the biggest compliment she'd ever gotten, and having it come from someone like Teddy, who she didn't just like, but admired, was a bonus. The ball went in. "I mean the whole zero-fucks thing comes back to bite me in the ass a lot. So... um, keep your ass covered? There, you give me advice, I do the same for you."
"Will do," Teddy promised, waiting to see if she'd go for the ball before he moved into her path. His smile turned wry. "It's a fine balance, isn't it? But if I keep trying to trust my own instincts and you work on giving... like... five percent of a fuck, we'll figure out this people thing eventually."
Well, he didn't want the ball so Lil went to grab it again. "Oh, speaking of that five percent I need to give... You know Shen, right? She's okay?"
That was a weird segue, and Teddy reacted with quiet alarm. "The last time I talked to her she was fine! Did something happen?"
"Did something happen? Oh shit, no, sorry Teddy." Damn brain, jumping ahead without a thought for what that would sound like. "I meant okay as in she's good people. I was sort of an asshole when we first met and that giving a fuck thing reminded me I should probably go apologize, I mean if you guys like her plus she's visited Nick... Well, I think I've probably been wrong about her, right? "
"Ohhh, okay. Sorry. I've been a bit jumpy lately, I guess," Teddy admitted sheepishly. "And Shen is definitely good people," he added much more firmly.
He paused for a beat, at war with himself for a moment about how to describe her. "Shen can be intense, and kind of self-righteous, but honestly I think she's allowed. She's not all hot air and petitions -- she really goes out of her way to take care of people. She actually left Gar's party the other day to drag me off and get me to talk and make sure I was doing okay, all because I looked tired. And she gives really good hugs," Teddy added as an afterthought.
"Ugh. Yup, I'm gonna have to talk to her if she's been looking out for you." Another apology to add to her collection, but then she was starting to accept that they were inevitable if she couldn't manage to get temper under control.
At least she'd distracted Teddy long enough to grab the ball. She'd sunk enough that she had a feeling this was going to go from just taking shots to some kind of real competition soon. No doubt Teddy would win, so she'd take whatever advantage she could get.
Lil looked like she was lining up another shot, so Teddy gave her space to take it. "Yeah. She has. Do I want to ask what you guys fought about, or should I leave it alone?"
"You know what? I don't even remember what it was about." Lil held on to the ball as she tried to remember, but there was nothing clear. "It wasn't much of a fight either - she said something, I didn't take it too well, and things just sort of went downhill. That was the only time we talked too so... sorta stupid, right?"
"Not really." She wasn't moving, so Teddy headed in with an eye toward smacking the ball down from between her hands. "She was the first person I met when I got here, and she got right up my nose for 'mansplaining.'" He shrugged expressively. "I'm dead sure she wouldn't have reacted that way if I'd said the exact same thing but been in a girl-shape at the time, but I have enough of a sense of self-preservation not to open that can of worms."
Lil laughed. "Yeah, I think I got torn into for using 'pansy' which, honest-to-god, I didn't know was a slur. I'm such a hick. I thought you called someone a pansy-ass 'cause, you know, flowers are delicate and all that." He was getting closer. "Still, I did call her a pansy-ass, so I gotta fix that with her." On the chance that he was getting serious, Lil stepped back and took her shot. It went way wide. She grinned at Teddy and took off for the ball.
He was too flabbergasted to move for a crucial moment, staring at her all but slack-jawed. "How are you even still alive? No wonder she got pissed." He started moving then, circling around to grab the ball as it bounced off the back wall. "Honestly I'd have been pissed, too. That's definitely not a word to throw around. We need to get you reading Urban Dictionary or something. Americanize your vocabulary," he added with a grin.
Lil slowed down when she realized Teddy had the ball. Also, her face was turning bright red over the whole misunderstanding and a moment to take a breath before letting him see that was required. That it would upset Shen was one thing, but that Teddy would be offended was a whole 'nother realm of embarrassing. "Shit, I guess so. It was just a word that people tossed around back home, and I never gave it much thought. Maybe it does mean the same thing there and I just never put two and two together."
"Yeah," Teddy said, a little more seriously than he had been before. "I'm pretty sure it does." He started dribbling, slowly, deliberately, and moving toward the net. It practically screamed 'come steal the ball.' Maybe she'd bite. "It's not the worst thing I've ever been called, mind you. And it's definitely not something you hear a lot down here. But you're better off coming up with some more creative insults. I like those Shakespeare insult generators - ever seen those?"
Okay, the whole slur talk had been painful, but at least it seemed to have made Teddy slow down a bit. "Naw, not my style. I think I'll just stick with the classics. Can't go wrong with 'asshole' or 'fucker'." She picked up speed and ran at Teddy, ready to steal the ball.
She was going for it, coming at him faster than most guys usually did, and for a second Teddy wondered if she remembered that basketball was a non-tackle sport. Still, he was fast on his feet too. He spun away from her as she came at him, keeping his body between her and the ball. Classic fake-out. He put on a burst of speed and doubled around her back, heading for the basket.
"Bastard!" Lil yelled, trying very hard not to laugh. "That's a classic too!" She already corrected course, but didn't have a hope in hell of getting in front of him to block the ball.
"Gotta be prepared," Teddy fired back cheerfully. Everything was lining up just right, the shot feeling good as it left his hands. He barely had to look to know that it was going to drop straight through, no fuss. He let out a deeply ungracious whoop, but it didn't make up for the noise of the crowd at a real game. Too bad he'd never actually play varsity now. "There's a lot to like about Xavier's," he said wistfully, "but the sports program here stinks."
Lil gave Teddy a small smile. She didn't miss the tone in his voice. "Hey, I know it's not much, but I'm up for this anytime you want. Maybe we can find a few more people?"
The ball was coming back in his direction and he didn't have to go too far to grab it again. "That'd be good, actually. I've got to try and convince Billy to play. Having a sport is supposed to be good for your mood," he finished firmly. "Adrenaline, endorphins, all that stuff." Billy'd done... track at his old school, that was it, and the irony considering the split between his and Tommy's powers made that kind of funny. But he definitely hadn't been doing wind sprints or anything like that since he'd gotten here.
"Or you just leave helping Billy out of this," Lil suggested. "Everything's been about Billy for the last little while, right? If he wants to play, sure, but maybe it's not so bad to have something to yourself where you don't have to worry about him."
Teddy felt the tips of his ears go warm with an embarrassed flush that thankfully didn't make it all the way to his cheeks. "I've been kind of monofocused lately, I guess," he replied sheepishly. He had things of his own... not many, especially considering he and Billy were usually in each others' back pockets ninety percent of the time, but some.
"Yeah, I noticed, but I was there with Nick. And... I been on the other side too." Lil winced at the memory. She'd been there in different ways for years, on and off, and her mom had been firmly stuck in Teddy's position. "Do some stuff to have fun on your own. Billy needs to know you're good, plus if he's getting better, he needs some room to figure out some of that himself. Gets to feel sorta... like you're a baby? When you don't have that room I mean." She sighed. "If that made any sense. I'm not good at this stuff."
"No, I think I get what you're saying." At least he probably did. It kind of fit with some things Billy had said, though Teddy still wasn't sure how much of it he meant and how much had been intended to stop Teddy from hovering in general. Maybe they were the same thing. "You went through something like this?" She'd hinted at it before but he hadn't wanted to pry, but it was just the two of them in the gym now, and she could tell him to back off if she needed to.
The ball game had com to a complete stop, so Lil walked over to Teddy. "School. Like, all of it. It was no friends, then a bad friend, then a dead bad friend so... yeah. Probably why I'm so prickly - I keep waiting for the normal shit to start falling again. But you know," Lil reached out and snatched the ball from Teddy, "You don't have to look after me either. I'll tell you about it later, but right now I'm supposed to be practicing so I can beat the everliving crap out of you at this game, right?"
He wanted to object, to tell her that looking out for each other was what friends did, but in the end what did he actually know about healthy friendships? He had things to think about later, anyway. So Teddy shrugged it off and flashed Lil a bright grin. "Something like that, but I think you have the end result reversed."
Lil grinned and backed away from him. "For now, but I'm watching every move you make. One of these days you're gonna get beaten by a girl." With that, she turned and took off for the net.
"Girl' isn't a problem." Teddy laughed and took off after her, shifting into girl-shape as he went to punctuate the reply. "But I'll be damned if I'm ever gonna get beaten by a Canadian."
