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ax_mainLil catches wind that Nick's back at school. When she finds out what happened, she enlists Teddy's help to talk to Nick.
Warning: Discussion of the events of the Orphaned Plot, so it's kind of a really sad log.
Christmas had been fun, if quiet. Boxing Day, usually the time when Lil and her mom would visit friends, wasn't even a thing here, so Lil had been left to try out the half-dozen new Game boy carts that her mother had sent her for Christmas. Somehow, the lack of any real Boxing Day left Lil feeling a little more empty than missing Christmas with her mom - it was a bigger marker of just how far away she was from home.
But the morning of the 27th was a back-to-normal, nothing day, so Lil was walking the hallway to the kitchen so she could restock her bedroom cookie supply when she heard someone mention Nick by name. She turned, but they'd already turned the corner. Not that who it was was important. All that mattered was that they'd said Nick and something about him being back. Lil grinned. That was the perfect excuse to raid the kitchen for snacks.
Several minutes later she was outside his door, carefully knocking on his door while balancing a load of chips and cookies in her arms.
"Nick!" She said. "Guess who!"
There was the sound of fumbling, and the door opened. Nick's room was an absolute mess behind him, though there wasn't a single light on in the room. Even Nick's computer was off, which was practically unprecedented; he never turned the damn thing off. His eyes were red and his nose was glistening, the fur around the bottoms of his eyes soaked. He was in the middle of a hiccuping sob, and he started crying again when he saw Lil at the door.
"Nick?" There was a moment of confusion because this scene was so different from the one that had been playing in Lil's head, but as soon as she realized that yes, he crying, she tossed the snacks inside the room, took Nick's hand and stepped into the room. "Hey, what's wrong?"
He let out another choking sob, the kind of sob that someone made when they'd been crying for hours. He followed her in, almost as if in a daze. "M-My parents," he sobbed out, all he could seemingly manage at the moment.
God, what did that mean? Lil's first thought was that the scenario Warren had deemed unlikely had come true - Nick's parents, always protective, had been spooked by Warren and his boyfriends coming out and had decided to pull Nick from school. That might explain why Nick was back early. He was to pack and then leave sometime soon, but that was too hard a thought to give much attention too. Maybe they were divorcing? That would definitely tear Nick apart.
Lil sat down on Nick's bed, pulled Nick down beside her and put an arm around his shoulders. "Okay, so it's something to do with your parents?"
"Th-th-they're..." He sobbed again, unable to finish. "Th-they're d-d-d-d..." He couldn't say it. He gave another hiccuping sob, and then coughed hoarsely. "Th-they're... s-s-so-someone... k-k-k-k..." He still couldn't say it. Unwilling, his sobs doubled in volume, and he clutched Lil closely, not caring about her personal space. He wanted her to be close. Someone real. Someone alive. Someone who cared about him who was still breathing.
It wasn't hard to work out what Nick was trying to say, even if it did seem unimaginable. His parents... dead? She hugged him tight with her one hand and fished her phone out of her pocket with the other. His dad who figured out Lil's intentions with the date without ever meeting her. His mother who sent back a whole meal for her at thanksgiving. They shouldn't be gone before she could ever say thank you in person. Lil found Teddy in her contacts, tapping out a message even though the screen was getting blurry. Stupid fucking tears. Why, when she didn't even know these people?
Come right away please
in Nick's room
She didn't have a fucking hope in hell of saying the right thing, but Teddy could. Teddy knew how to talk through things and give a person some comfort. All Lil could do was toss her phone on Nick's bed and wrap both arms around him, hoping that that gave him even a bit of what he needed right now.
----
"All I'm saying is that the tone shift for the Canto Blight arc was-" Teddy's pocket buzzed and he stopped talking long enough to pull his phone out of his pocket with the hand that wasn't currently lightly interlaced with Billy's. "Hang on." It wasn't his mom texting - that had been his first thought, especially given the disaster coming-out conversation she'd sprung on him only a few days ago. His brow furrowed when he read Lil's message, trying to fit it into some kind of context.
What's up? he texted back, though given the panic-sound in her text it could be anything. More Nolan drama? Not if Nick was involved. He glanced up at Billy, stepping to the side and away from the crowd currently moving through the mall. "It's Lil. Something's up at school," he explained, apology in his eyes.
Billy turned to look when Teddy cut off mid-sentence, watching as his boyfriend typed out a message and started veering them off to the side so they wouldn’t be in the way. “Lil?” He asked. “Like school under attack or more relationship drama?”
----
Teddy's response was fast, bless him, and Lil tapped out a response behind Nick's back.
Nick's parents died.
She thought about adding more, but the texting was awkward enough and a longer response would mean pushing Nick away for a few moments and that, with him still sobbing into her shoulder, we unthinkable.
"I think Teddy's coming too, Nick," Lil said softly. "And I'm not going anywhere."
----
“Oh shit,” Teddy breathed out, and he turned his phone to show Billy rather than read the second text out loud. “I’m sorry to do this, but is there any way-” he trailed off. But they’d have more chances for dates, this was bigger than that. “Can you get me to school? I’ll make it up to you,” he promised, his heart lurching in his chest.
Billy frowned when the phone was turned his way, expecting anything but what he read. “Holy shit!” He yelled a little too loudly, getting a few stares, but he couldn’t give a fuck. He had only hung out with Nick on a handful of occasions, but he was one of the sweetest guys Billy had met and...damn.
Billy nodded, quickly grabbing Teddy’s arm to drag him to the mens bathroom. After checking all the stalls to make sure they were alone, Billy turned towards Teddy and took his hand. “Text me when you get there so I know I didn’t put you in the void or something.”
He wouldn’t. He couldn’t.
“IwantTeddytobeinNick’sroomIwantTeddytobeinNick’sroomIwantTeddytobeinNick’sroom.” With a bright flash blue light, Billy was left alone in the malls bathroom.
----
Even in the darkness of Nick's room, he didn't see the flash of the blue light, nestled against Lil like he was, but he heard a slight crackling sound and something heavy hit the floor. Another sob hitched in his chest. Someone else who cared. Someone who he, with his own problems, was prying away from someone else. It wasn't fair of him, Nick thought, but as another sob shook him, he didn't care in the slightest. He was hurting, and he was hurting so, so badly. He'd give anything for a chance to pry this icy hand out of his chest for just a few seconds. He hurt all over.
He hadn't even realized that he hadn't even changed out of the clothes he'd been brought back to the school in. The knees of his jeans were stained dark with mud, and he probably stank but he didn't care. He was worried he'd never care again. He couldn't even stop crying to make sure that Teddy had been sent over alright.
Lil offered Teddy a troubled half-smile. "That was fast." She pulled away from nick, just a touch so she could talk to him. "Hey, Teddy's here too now."
It took Teddy a couple of seconds to get his bearings even after he landed in Nick's room. Billy's teleport had only stuck him about six inches off the ground this time, so that was something of an improvement, but the dark room didn't help the moment of panicked disorientation at all. His eyes adjusted and he was able to zero in on Lil's voice, the shapes of Nick's furniture and the indistinct forms of two bodies getting clearer. Teddy's phone was still in his hand and he blinked at the bright light when he swiped the screen on, tapping out a quick message.
I'm here in one piece. I'll call you later. xoxox
And he shoved it in his pocket, killing the light and forcing his eyes to adjust again. "Billy teleported me," he explained quietly, making his way over to the bed and the pair of shapes sitting in the dark. If he gave himself cat's eyes, would he be able to see better? He tried it and it seemed to work, the scene shifting into muted-colour clarity. "Hey," Teddy said, sitting down on Nick's other side. There was no way to do the next bit without being awkward, unfortunately. "What happened?"
Nick managed to stifle a sob, and was about to speak, but he coughed instead, hoarse and groaning from it. "Th-they..." He was stuffed all the way up through his nose and beyond, it felt like. He felt raw from his tongue to the pit of his stomach. "S-so-someone... m-m-must have s-seen me," he managed, trying to calm himself. It was easier, now. Now that he was getting used to the idea of talking to anyone. "Th-through a window, maybe?" He sniffled. "S-some men came. Th-they th-threw a brick through our window," he said, the tears coming again. "A-and then there was fire, and then there was shooting and mom screamed and dad was bleeding and she told me to run." He sobbed, throwing himself toward Lil again. "A-and I ran," Nick moaned, sobbing into Lil.
"Jesus." And there it was, the manifestation of her own mother's fear that Lil had lived under, but never truly felt the weight of, her whole life. Her mother would worry, and Lil would brush it off, either because the idea that she could be hurt was laughable or because there were simpler issues, like her height or her temper, that always seemed to do more damage. But her mom and had right and Nick, crying in her arms, was proof of that. One person had simply seen Nick, and that was enough. They're scared because we're living weapons, was what Jean-Paul had said... except Nick wasn't, not in any sense of the word. Of all the people here he was the one who least deserved it. "You did right to run Nick."
Holy shit. Teddy bit it back rather than say it out loud, his shock only reinforcing Lil's. That couldn't be what Nick needed to hear right now, could it? What did he need? Teddy's father was dead, yeah, but so long ago that he'd only ever been an abstract concept, not a real living person that Teddy had known and loved. This was so far beyond any of that -- Nick's grief so raw and overwhelming -- that Teddy was momentarily entirely speechless.
"Yeah," Teddy forced himself to say after a beat. A beat too long, he was sure of it. "Lil's absolutely right. Against a mob, with guns? Getting out of there was the best possible choice." He reached out, resting a hand on Nick's shoulder, for lack of any other ideas. "Did you come right back here?"
Nick couldn't manage to say anything, at the moment, so he just nodded instead. "C-Clarice came, wi-with others," he said, after a beat.
And there was the guilt. Lil had made a promise to Nick to watch his back and when he'd really needed her, she wasn't there. Not to protect him and not to rescue him and Jesus fucking Christ, not even to comfort him when he first got back. But then, by the state of his room, his dirty clothes, and by the way he clung to Lil now, no one had. This fucking school... "And they just dropped you off in your room and left you?"
Clarice? How had Clarice - and others - known that Nick was in trouble when Teddy hadn't? Thank God they had, and he was safe, but that didn't even begin to explain things. Teddy swallowed hard against the rush of emotion, too muddled to pick out which feeling as what right now. "We're here now," he said firmly instead of any one of the dozen other things ricocheting around inside his mind right then. "You're not alone, okay? Not anymore. Lil and I -- we've got you. Are you hurt at all? Physically, I mean. Did you get burned?" Or shot? If he had, he'd still be in the infirmary, Teddy was sure of that much.
Nick didn't have quite the wherewithal to answer Lil's question. Teddy's was much simpler. He shook his head against Lil to answer him.
Lil wished she could spare a hand to wipe her cheeks because she was damn sure that there were tears. His parents gone, him brought back and dumped in a room by himself while his best friends are left in the dark... She gave Teddy a puzzled look and mouthed a question she was almost certain she already knew the answer to. They didn't tell you?
Teddy shook his head, not sure how well she could see him in the dark. And that hurt, knowing that whoever had been sent, Teddy and Lil obviously hadn't made the cut. "Okay," he said out loud, trying to get some kind of plan in mind. What would his mother do in this kind of situation? Physical safety first, then she'd try to feed him. Nick wasn't hurt, but he also obviously wasn't able to take care of himself right now either. "You stay right here," Teddy said, squeezing Nick's shoulder. "If it's okay, I'm gonna find you some clean clothes. So tell me now if there are any drawers over there I shouldn't open."
"Okay," Nick murmured, not protesting about Teddy opening any drawers. Whatever, Teddy would see that he was a boxers kid. He didn't care. It was so hard to care right now about anything.
"I'm gonna let you go now, okay?" Lil smiled and moved her hands to Nick's shoulders. Teddy's instincts were good, and Lil figured she'd follow his lead. "I'm gonna take 5 minutes and make you a couple of sandwiches. I know you probably don't feel like it, but you need it. Plus, I'll be out of the way while you're getting changed." She glanced at Teddy for reassurance. Food was the right thing right now, wasn't it?
Okay... Teddy'd been half-counting on Lil being there to hold Nick up while he rummaged around in Nick's closet, but food was a good call too. He opened the dresser drawers quickly until he could collect most of the components of a comfortable outfit - sweatpants, clean shirt, boxers. He wasn't even going to try and figure out socks.
"Mm-hmm," Nick murmured to Lil, and he scooted away to let her stand. "Y-you can turn my lamp on," he managed to say, quietly; Nick had a desk lamp that would shed enough light so everyone could see, but he wasn't ready for it to be bright in here. Not yet.
Lil nodded and flicked the lamp on as she went by. She kicked the junk food she'd dumped earlier out of the way. Not what Nick needed right now. Of course, she was lost as to what he really did need. Hugs, clothes, food... that stuff they could handle for the moment, but he'd need more than that, wouldn't he? Did the school have councilors? Anyone who could help Nick through this better then a couple of teenagers? God. Lil jogged down the hall to the kitchen, keeping her head down to forestall any questions from people she might run into.
The light burned into Teddy's eyes until he shifted them back to regular, taking in the state of the room -- and Nick -- as it really was. The ache in Teddy's heart deepened at the obvious signs of Nick's distress, and he hurried back over to the bed with clothes in hand. He dropped down to sit beside Nick, on the off chance that the physical comfort would be any kind of helpful. "Here," he said quietly. "Whenever you're ready. But we should get you out of that dirty stuff."
"Y-yeah," Nick said, taking the clothes from Teddy. "I-I'll go... change," he said, going toward his bathroom with the clothing bundle. It was so hard to keep it together, but he was so tired. Had he slept at all since they'd taken him home? Maybe. He didn't remember. Everything was so blurred.
----
Ham and cheese, that was easy enough. Lil grabbed what she needed and dumped it on the counter. The sandwiches weren't going to be pretty, but Nick just needed something to fill him up and give him some energy to deal with all the horror that he'd just gone through. It wasn't enough.
,She should have been there. She should have asked if she could have gone home with him - the fuckers would have a hard time shooting his parents if she stood in the way - or joined X-Force so that she could have been there to bring him back. Now she was just making sandwiches and no way did that make up for how she'd failed Nick.
She finished up the food, grabbed a paper plate and stacked them up. Water, that would be good too with all the crying he (and fuck, she) was doing. There were flats in the pantry and Lil grabbed one with her free hand. Couldn't hurt to have a couple dozen bottles stored away in Nick's room, especially since she figured she'd be spending her free time there, because if she couldn't be there for him when he'd been under threat, she sure as fuck could be there now. Heck, he even had a spare bed. If she was careful, and if people kept there mouths shut, maybe she could sleep there. Days were bad enough when you were lost, but the nights were godawful. Okay, that was a plan.
With everything loaded up, she headed back to the room.
----
With Nick in the bathroom, Teddy had a moment to sit and think. How did anyone fix this? There wasn't a way, not that he could see. All the practical stuff that went with parents dying - pensions and housing and legal guardianship and God knew what else - was so far above his head that he didn't even know where to begin. The Professor would be seeing to that, though. He had to be dealing with it now, and giving Nick some time to be alone and grieve. Except that being alone was the least useful thing.
And then there was the rest of it. Who had killed Nick's parents? Was it the same guys who'd lured Magneto and the Brotherhood into a trap? Or worse, nothing organizaed at all, just a random mob of scared people lashing out? If that was the case, if it had been Nick's parents neighbours and friends who'd done something so awful, then mutants were all in a lot worse trouble than he'd realized.
It had been quiet for a while, and Teddy rose to his feet. "You okay in there?" he called out.
Everything hurt. Looking in the bathroom mirror wasn't helping anything. He'd changed and he'd tossed his dirty clothes, perhaps childishly, into the corner. He wanted to be as far away from them as he could. When Teddy called at the door, though, Nick realized he wasn't just stuck in here. He opened the door and stepped out, head down. "Sorry," he murmured.
Lil arrived just in time to see Nick come out of the bathroom looking, if not exactly better, at least cleaner. She put the water down by the door - she'd find a better place for it later - and waved Nick back to the bed. "Food. Probably not what you want right now, but you need it."
"Don't apologize," Teddy said firmly. "You don't need to apologize for anything right now. Lil brought sandwiches - when was the last time you ate anything?" He could hear his own mother's voice practically channeling through him, but that was okay for now. There were worse role models for tough situations.
"S-sorry," Nick said, feeling just slightly chastised. It was so hard to care about food, though. "I... I'll... try to eat," he said, though he wanted to do anything but. He felt like eating might make him puke. "I... I don't... think I ate since... since before it happened," he mumbled.
Lil took his hand and pulled him down to sit beside her. She had a feeling that she'd be doing a lot of that in the next week or so - poor Nick still looked like he was only half there with them, still in shock from everything that had happened. She smiled, held out the plate and put her free arm around his back. "Well, eat what you can, then I'll tell you about an idea I had, and you can say whether you think it's a good idea or not."
Feeling extraneous, and more than a little helpless, Teddy dropped to sit on Nick's other side again, he and Lil forming a protective wall around Nick. "Don't push it if you're not feeling it, but I bet it'll help. At least a little."
"I just...." He sniffled a bit. "Thank you," he said, weakly, instead, feebly picking up one of the sandwiches and biting into it halfheartedly.
Lil reached the hand behind Nick out to give Teddy a touch as well, figuring that he could use a bit of support too. Nothing was going to be easy for either of them for awhile. "Okay, so I was thinking that you've got that spare bed there and maybe you need some company for a bit? Even if it's just someone to grab sandwiches for you. So... I can grab some stuff and sleep here for a bit, as long as people keep quiet about me doing that."
"It's not a bad idea. We can even switch off, if you want," Teddy offered, looping a finger around Lil's and giving her hand a quick squeeze back. "If you're really worried about gossip, but I don't think anyone will go there. Not when- not when Nick needs friends," he amended what he'd been about to say.
"Th-thanks," Nick mumbled, pathetically, around a half-mouthful of sandwich. "I-I think I'd like that," he said.
"Awesome. I mean, if you want some time alone, you can just tell me, but being alone when you're hurting is the worst." That was something Lil had had too much experience with the last couple of years. She looked over at Teddy. "I'm good I think. I'll just bring some stuff over and set up here. If people gossip, I don't care. It's more that I don't want anyone saying something to a teacher or something and get us in trouble for breaking rules."
"They don't seem to care that much, honestly," Teddy shrugged off her concern. "People have been playing musical rooms here since day one. As long as nothing blows up-" oops. Was that a dumb thing to say? Nick had said fire, but not explosions, but- he stopped before he finished that sentence, just to be on the safe side. "I don't think they'll even notice." He turned his attention to Nick, bumped against him gently with his shoulder. "And I'm right next door. I can come over when Lil's not here, or if you just feel like changing scenery, come to my room. Billy won't mind."
"You guys are the best," Nick said, swallowing the bite he'd taken of sandwich. It didn't taste like anything to him. "Thank you so much," he said, his vision getting blurry again. At least there were still people who cared. He let out a small sob.
Lil leaned her head over to touch Nick's for a moment. "No problem. I only wish I'd been there for you, Nick, 'cause none of this is any fair."
They both should have been there - Teddy should have been there. He was even on the team. He'd signed up because he'd thought he'd be helping people, and he hadn't even been allowed to do that. He could make up for it now, though. "No-one deserves this, but you least of all. I know we can't fix it, but if there's anything at all we can do to help-" he caught Lil's eye over Nick's head and gave her a tight smile. "You know we'll do it."
"Thank you," Nick said again, voice quavering slightly. He felt like he was going to just keep saying that, so he stuffed his mouth with another bite of sandwich. It still tasted like nothing. He liked it here, between them. It felt safe. Maybe, just maybe, he felt like he could be okay.
Warning: Discussion of the events of the Orphaned Plot, so it's kind of a really sad log.
Christmas had been fun, if quiet. Boxing Day, usually the time when Lil and her mom would visit friends, wasn't even a thing here, so Lil had been left to try out the half-dozen new Game boy carts that her mother had sent her for Christmas. Somehow, the lack of any real Boxing Day left Lil feeling a little more empty than missing Christmas with her mom - it was a bigger marker of just how far away she was from home.
But the morning of the 27th was a back-to-normal, nothing day, so Lil was walking the hallway to the kitchen so she could restock her bedroom cookie supply when she heard someone mention Nick by name. She turned, but they'd already turned the corner. Not that who it was was important. All that mattered was that they'd said Nick and something about him being back. Lil grinned. That was the perfect excuse to raid the kitchen for snacks.
Several minutes later she was outside his door, carefully knocking on his door while balancing a load of chips and cookies in her arms.
"Nick!" She said. "Guess who!"
There was the sound of fumbling, and the door opened. Nick's room was an absolute mess behind him, though there wasn't a single light on in the room. Even Nick's computer was off, which was practically unprecedented; he never turned the damn thing off. His eyes were red and his nose was glistening, the fur around the bottoms of his eyes soaked. He was in the middle of a hiccuping sob, and he started crying again when he saw Lil at the door.
"Nick?" There was a moment of confusion because this scene was so different from the one that had been playing in Lil's head, but as soon as she realized that yes, he crying, she tossed the snacks inside the room, took Nick's hand and stepped into the room. "Hey, what's wrong?"
He let out another choking sob, the kind of sob that someone made when they'd been crying for hours. He followed her in, almost as if in a daze. "M-My parents," he sobbed out, all he could seemingly manage at the moment.
God, what did that mean? Lil's first thought was that the scenario Warren had deemed unlikely had come true - Nick's parents, always protective, had been spooked by Warren and his boyfriends coming out and had decided to pull Nick from school. That might explain why Nick was back early. He was to pack and then leave sometime soon, but that was too hard a thought to give much attention too. Maybe they were divorcing? That would definitely tear Nick apart.
Lil sat down on Nick's bed, pulled Nick down beside her and put an arm around his shoulders. "Okay, so it's something to do with your parents?"
"Th-th-they're..." He sobbed again, unable to finish. "Th-they're d-d-d-d..." He couldn't say it. He gave another hiccuping sob, and then coughed hoarsely. "Th-they're... s-s-so-someone... k-k-k-k..." He still couldn't say it. Unwilling, his sobs doubled in volume, and he clutched Lil closely, not caring about her personal space. He wanted her to be close. Someone real. Someone alive. Someone who cared about him who was still breathing.
It wasn't hard to work out what Nick was trying to say, even if it did seem unimaginable. His parents... dead? She hugged him tight with her one hand and fished her phone out of her pocket with the other. His dad who figured out Lil's intentions with the date without ever meeting her. His mother who sent back a whole meal for her at thanksgiving. They shouldn't be gone before she could ever say thank you in person. Lil found Teddy in her contacts, tapping out a message even though the screen was getting blurry. Stupid fucking tears. Why, when she didn't even know these people?
Come right away please
in Nick's room
She didn't have a fucking hope in hell of saying the right thing, but Teddy could. Teddy knew how to talk through things and give a person some comfort. All Lil could do was toss her phone on Nick's bed and wrap both arms around him, hoping that that gave him even a bit of what he needed right now.
----
"All I'm saying is that the tone shift for the Canto Blight arc was-" Teddy's pocket buzzed and he stopped talking long enough to pull his phone out of his pocket with the hand that wasn't currently lightly interlaced with Billy's. "Hang on." It wasn't his mom texting - that had been his first thought, especially given the disaster coming-out conversation she'd sprung on him only a few days ago. His brow furrowed when he read Lil's message, trying to fit it into some kind of context.
What's up? he texted back, though given the panic-sound in her text it could be anything. More Nolan drama? Not if Nick was involved. He glanced up at Billy, stepping to the side and away from the crowd currently moving through the mall. "It's Lil. Something's up at school," he explained, apology in his eyes.
Billy turned to look when Teddy cut off mid-sentence, watching as his boyfriend typed out a message and started veering them off to the side so they wouldn’t be in the way. “Lil?” He asked. “Like school under attack or more relationship drama?”
----
Teddy's response was fast, bless him, and Lil tapped out a response behind Nick's back.
Nick's parents died.
She thought about adding more, but the texting was awkward enough and a longer response would mean pushing Nick away for a few moments and that, with him still sobbing into her shoulder, we unthinkable.
"I think Teddy's coming too, Nick," Lil said softly. "And I'm not going anywhere."
----
“Oh shit,” Teddy breathed out, and he turned his phone to show Billy rather than read the second text out loud. “I’m sorry to do this, but is there any way-” he trailed off. But they’d have more chances for dates, this was bigger than that. “Can you get me to school? I’ll make it up to you,” he promised, his heart lurching in his chest.
Billy frowned when the phone was turned his way, expecting anything but what he read. “Holy shit!” He yelled a little too loudly, getting a few stares, but he couldn’t give a fuck. He had only hung out with Nick on a handful of occasions, but he was one of the sweetest guys Billy had met and...damn.
Billy nodded, quickly grabbing Teddy’s arm to drag him to the mens bathroom. After checking all the stalls to make sure they were alone, Billy turned towards Teddy and took his hand. “Text me when you get there so I know I didn’t put you in the void or something.”
He wouldn’t. He couldn’t.
“IwantTeddytobeinNick’sroomIwantTeddytobeinNick’sroomIwantTeddytobeinNick’sroom.” With a bright flash blue light, Billy was left alone in the malls bathroom.
----
Even in the darkness of Nick's room, he didn't see the flash of the blue light, nestled against Lil like he was, but he heard a slight crackling sound and something heavy hit the floor. Another sob hitched in his chest. Someone else who cared. Someone who he, with his own problems, was prying away from someone else. It wasn't fair of him, Nick thought, but as another sob shook him, he didn't care in the slightest. He was hurting, and he was hurting so, so badly. He'd give anything for a chance to pry this icy hand out of his chest for just a few seconds. He hurt all over.
He hadn't even realized that he hadn't even changed out of the clothes he'd been brought back to the school in. The knees of his jeans were stained dark with mud, and he probably stank but he didn't care. He was worried he'd never care again. He couldn't even stop crying to make sure that Teddy had been sent over alright.
Lil offered Teddy a troubled half-smile. "That was fast." She pulled away from nick, just a touch so she could talk to him. "Hey, Teddy's here too now."
It took Teddy a couple of seconds to get his bearings even after he landed in Nick's room. Billy's teleport had only stuck him about six inches off the ground this time, so that was something of an improvement, but the dark room didn't help the moment of panicked disorientation at all. His eyes adjusted and he was able to zero in on Lil's voice, the shapes of Nick's furniture and the indistinct forms of two bodies getting clearer. Teddy's phone was still in his hand and he blinked at the bright light when he swiped the screen on, tapping out a quick message.
I'm here in one piece. I'll call you later. xoxox
And he shoved it in his pocket, killing the light and forcing his eyes to adjust again. "Billy teleported me," he explained quietly, making his way over to the bed and the pair of shapes sitting in the dark. If he gave himself cat's eyes, would he be able to see better? He tried it and it seemed to work, the scene shifting into muted-colour clarity. "Hey," Teddy said, sitting down on Nick's other side. There was no way to do the next bit without being awkward, unfortunately. "What happened?"
Nick managed to stifle a sob, and was about to speak, but he coughed instead, hoarse and groaning from it. "Th-they..." He was stuffed all the way up through his nose and beyond, it felt like. He felt raw from his tongue to the pit of his stomach. "S-so-someone... m-m-must have s-seen me," he managed, trying to calm himself. It was easier, now. Now that he was getting used to the idea of talking to anyone. "Th-through a window, maybe?" He sniffled. "S-some men came. Th-they th-threw a brick through our window," he said, the tears coming again. "A-and then there was fire, and then there was shooting and mom screamed and dad was bleeding and she told me to run." He sobbed, throwing himself toward Lil again. "A-and I ran," Nick moaned, sobbing into Lil.
"Jesus." And there it was, the manifestation of her own mother's fear that Lil had lived under, but never truly felt the weight of, her whole life. Her mother would worry, and Lil would brush it off, either because the idea that she could be hurt was laughable or because there were simpler issues, like her height or her temper, that always seemed to do more damage. But her mom and had right and Nick, crying in her arms, was proof of that. One person had simply seen Nick, and that was enough. They're scared because we're living weapons, was what Jean-Paul had said... except Nick wasn't, not in any sense of the word. Of all the people here he was the one who least deserved it. "You did right to run Nick."
Holy shit. Teddy bit it back rather than say it out loud, his shock only reinforcing Lil's. That couldn't be what Nick needed to hear right now, could it? What did he need? Teddy's father was dead, yeah, but so long ago that he'd only ever been an abstract concept, not a real living person that Teddy had known and loved. This was so far beyond any of that -- Nick's grief so raw and overwhelming -- that Teddy was momentarily entirely speechless.
"Yeah," Teddy forced himself to say after a beat. A beat too long, he was sure of it. "Lil's absolutely right. Against a mob, with guns? Getting out of there was the best possible choice." He reached out, resting a hand on Nick's shoulder, for lack of any other ideas. "Did you come right back here?"
Nick couldn't manage to say anything, at the moment, so he just nodded instead. "C-Clarice came, wi-with others," he said, after a beat.
And there was the guilt. Lil had made a promise to Nick to watch his back and when he'd really needed her, she wasn't there. Not to protect him and not to rescue him and Jesus fucking Christ, not even to comfort him when he first got back. But then, by the state of his room, his dirty clothes, and by the way he clung to Lil now, no one had. This fucking school... "And they just dropped you off in your room and left you?"
Clarice? How had Clarice - and others - known that Nick was in trouble when Teddy hadn't? Thank God they had, and he was safe, but that didn't even begin to explain things. Teddy swallowed hard against the rush of emotion, too muddled to pick out which feeling as what right now. "We're here now," he said firmly instead of any one of the dozen other things ricocheting around inside his mind right then. "You're not alone, okay? Not anymore. Lil and I -- we've got you. Are you hurt at all? Physically, I mean. Did you get burned?" Or shot? If he had, he'd still be in the infirmary, Teddy was sure of that much.
Nick didn't have quite the wherewithal to answer Lil's question. Teddy's was much simpler. He shook his head against Lil to answer him.
Lil wished she could spare a hand to wipe her cheeks because she was damn sure that there were tears. His parents gone, him brought back and dumped in a room by himself while his best friends are left in the dark... She gave Teddy a puzzled look and mouthed a question she was almost certain she already knew the answer to. They didn't tell you?
Teddy shook his head, not sure how well she could see him in the dark. And that hurt, knowing that whoever had been sent, Teddy and Lil obviously hadn't made the cut. "Okay," he said out loud, trying to get some kind of plan in mind. What would his mother do in this kind of situation? Physical safety first, then she'd try to feed him. Nick wasn't hurt, but he also obviously wasn't able to take care of himself right now either. "You stay right here," Teddy said, squeezing Nick's shoulder. "If it's okay, I'm gonna find you some clean clothes. So tell me now if there are any drawers over there I shouldn't open."
"Okay," Nick murmured, not protesting about Teddy opening any drawers. Whatever, Teddy would see that he was a boxers kid. He didn't care. It was so hard to care right now about anything.
"I'm gonna let you go now, okay?" Lil smiled and moved her hands to Nick's shoulders. Teddy's instincts were good, and Lil figured she'd follow his lead. "I'm gonna take 5 minutes and make you a couple of sandwiches. I know you probably don't feel like it, but you need it. Plus, I'll be out of the way while you're getting changed." She glanced at Teddy for reassurance. Food was the right thing right now, wasn't it?
Okay... Teddy'd been half-counting on Lil being there to hold Nick up while he rummaged around in Nick's closet, but food was a good call too. He opened the dresser drawers quickly until he could collect most of the components of a comfortable outfit - sweatpants, clean shirt, boxers. He wasn't even going to try and figure out socks.
"Mm-hmm," Nick murmured to Lil, and he scooted away to let her stand. "Y-you can turn my lamp on," he managed to say, quietly; Nick had a desk lamp that would shed enough light so everyone could see, but he wasn't ready for it to be bright in here. Not yet.
Lil nodded and flicked the lamp on as she went by. She kicked the junk food she'd dumped earlier out of the way. Not what Nick needed right now. Of course, she was lost as to what he really did need. Hugs, clothes, food... that stuff they could handle for the moment, but he'd need more than that, wouldn't he? Did the school have councilors? Anyone who could help Nick through this better then a couple of teenagers? God. Lil jogged down the hall to the kitchen, keeping her head down to forestall any questions from people she might run into.
The light burned into Teddy's eyes until he shifted them back to regular, taking in the state of the room -- and Nick -- as it really was. The ache in Teddy's heart deepened at the obvious signs of Nick's distress, and he hurried back over to the bed with clothes in hand. He dropped down to sit beside Nick, on the off chance that the physical comfort would be any kind of helpful. "Here," he said quietly. "Whenever you're ready. But we should get you out of that dirty stuff."
"Y-yeah," Nick said, taking the clothes from Teddy. "I-I'll go... change," he said, going toward his bathroom with the clothing bundle. It was so hard to keep it together, but he was so tired. Had he slept at all since they'd taken him home? Maybe. He didn't remember. Everything was so blurred.
----
Ham and cheese, that was easy enough. Lil grabbed what she needed and dumped it on the counter. The sandwiches weren't going to be pretty, but Nick just needed something to fill him up and give him some energy to deal with all the horror that he'd just gone through. It wasn't enough.
,She should have been there. She should have asked if she could have gone home with him - the fuckers would have a hard time shooting his parents if she stood in the way - or joined X-Force so that she could have been there to bring him back. Now she was just making sandwiches and no way did that make up for how she'd failed Nick.
She finished up the food, grabbed a paper plate and stacked them up. Water, that would be good too with all the crying he (and fuck, she) was doing. There were flats in the pantry and Lil grabbed one with her free hand. Couldn't hurt to have a couple dozen bottles stored away in Nick's room, especially since she figured she'd be spending her free time there, because if she couldn't be there for him when he'd been under threat, she sure as fuck could be there now. Heck, he even had a spare bed. If she was careful, and if people kept there mouths shut, maybe she could sleep there. Days were bad enough when you were lost, but the nights were godawful. Okay, that was a plan.
With everything loaded up, she headed back to the room.
----
With Nick in the bathroom, Teddy had a moment to sit and think. How did anyone fix this? There wasn't a way, not that he could see. All the practical stuff that went with parents dying - pensions and housing and legal guardianship and God knew what else - was so far above his head that he didn't even know where to begin. The Professor would be seeing to that, though. He had to be dealing with it now, and giving Nick some time to be alone and grieve. Except that being alone was the least useful thing.
And then there was the rest of it. Who had killed Nick's parents? Was it the same guys who'd lured Magneto and the Brotherhood into a trap? Or worse, nothing organizaed at all, just a random mob of scared people lashing out? If that was the case, if it had been Nick's parents neighbours and friends who'd done something so awful, then mutants were all in a lot worse trouble than he'd realized.
It had been quiet for a while, and Teddy rose to his feet. "You okay in there?" he called out.
Everything hurt. Looking in the bathroom mirror wasn't helping anything. He'd changed and he'd tossed his dirty clothes, perhaps childishly, into the corner. He wanted to be as far away from them as he could. When Teddy called at the door, though, Nick realized he wasn't just stuck in here. He opened the door and stepped out, head down. "Sorry," he murmured.
Lil arrived just in time to see Nick come out of the bathroom looking, if not exactly better, at least cleaner. She put the water down by the door - she'd find a better place for it later - and waved Nick back to the bed. "Food. Probably not what you want right now, but you need it."
"Don't apologize," Teddy said firmly. "You don't need to apologize for anything right now. Lil brought sandwiches - when was the last time you ate anything?" He could hear his own mother's voice practically channeling through him, but that was okay for now. There were worse role models for tough situations.
"S-sorry," Nick said, feeling just slightly chastised. It was so hard to care about food, though. "I... I'll... try to eat," he said, though he wanted to do anything but. He felt like eating might make him puke. "I... I don't... think I ate since... since before it happened," he mumbled.
Lil took his hand and pulled him down to sit beside her. She had a feeling that she'd be doing a lot of that in the next week or so - poor Nick still looked like he was only half there with them, still in shock from everything that had happened. She smiled, held out the plate and put her free arm around his back. "Well, eat what you can, then I'll tell you about an idea I had, and you can say whether you think it's a good idea or not."
Feeling extraneous, and more than a little helpless, Teddy dropped to sit on Nick's other side again, he and Lil forming a protective wall around Nick. "Don't push it if you're not feeling it, but I bet it'll help. At least a little."
"I just...." He sniffled a bit. "Thank you," he said, weakly, instead, feebly picking up one of the sandwiches and biting into it halfheartedly.
Lil reached the hand behind Nick out to give Teddy a touch as well, figuring that he could use a bit of support too. Nothing was going to be easy for either of them for awhile. "Okay, so I was thinking that you've got that spare bed there and maybe you need some company for a bit? Even if it's just someone to grab sandwiches for you. So... I can grab some stuff and sleep here for a bit, as long as people keep quiet about me doing that."
"It's not a bad idea. We can even switch off, if you want," Teddy offered, looping a finger around Lil's and giving her hand a quick squeeze back. "If you're really worried about gossip, but I don't think anyone will go there. Not when- not when Nick needs friends," he amended what he'd been about to say.
"Th-thanks," Nick mumbled, pathetically, around a half-mouthful of sandwich. "I-I think I'd like that," he said.
"Awesome. I mean, if you want some time alone, you can just tell me, but being alone when you're hurting is the worst." That was something Lil had had too much experience with the last couple of years. She looked over at Teddy. "I'm good I think. I'll just bring some stuff over and set up here. If people gossip, I don't care. It's more that I don't want anyone saying something to a teacher or something and get us in trouble for breaking rules."
"They don't seem to care that much, honestly," Teddy shrugged off her concern. "People have been playing musical rooms here since day one. As long as nothing blows up-" oops. Was that a dumb thing to say? Nick had said fire, but not explosions, but- he stopped before he finished that sentence, just to be on the safe side. "I don't think they'll even notice." He turned his attention to Nick, bumped against him gently with his shoulder. "And I'm right next door. I can come over when Lil's not here, or if you just feel like changing scenery, come to my room. Billy won't mind."
"You guys are the best," Nick said, swallowing the bite he'd taken of sandwich. It didn't taste like anything to him. "Thank you so much," he said, his vision getting blurry again. At least there were still people who cared. He let out a small sob.
Lil leaned her head over to touch Nick's for a moment. "No problem. I only wish I'd been there for you, Nick, 'cause none of this is any fair."
They both should have been there - Teddy should have been there. He was even on the team. He'd signed up because he'd thought he'd be helping people, and he hadn't even been allowed to do that. He could make up for it now, though. "No-one deserves this, but you least of all. I know we can't fix it, but if there's anything at all we can do to help-" he caught Lil's eye over Nick's head and gave her a tight smile. "You know we'll do it."
"Thank you," Nick said again, voice quavering slightly. He felt like he was going to just keep saying that, so he stuffed his mouth with another bite of sandwich. It still tasted like nothing. He liked it here, between them. It felt safe. Maybe, just maybe, he felt like he could be okay.
